


Man, I Surely Hate Dragons

by SeriTheButterfly



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:54:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 19
Words: 35,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25084999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeriTheButterfly/pseuds/SeriTheButterfly
Summary: I found myself in Westeros' most dragon-filled time period. How does Seri fare when she's put in the body of Westeros' most hated stepmother's body? An Alicent Hightower SI.
Comments: 46
Kudos: 275





	1. Prologue: Land of Nowhere

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: The backstory of the SI does not completely reflect the author's life.  
> My thank my beta readers, Bullet and Leonie.

20200***

_“**** ** we ** with **** ***?”_

_“Ahh, it’ll ** a ******* if ** ***** ** ****. ***** ** **** the ***.”_

_“Won’t **** be **********? **** ****...”_

_“*** still have *** ***** to ******* **** ****? Go *** **** *****.”_

_“****...”_

———

“Hmm.” Oh man, this felt awful. Just woke up, my throat was burning.

I tried to take a deep breath but started to cough halfway through. I bent forward and squeezed out, “Water... please...”

I heard some grumbling, but soon a cup was in my hand.

I didn’t get some sort of serious sickness, did I? I jokingly thought, and drank the liquid mum gave me. “Thanks, m—”

...That’s not my mum.

A girl with stunning violet eyes was rolling her eyes, dislike apparent on her face. But that’s not the point.

The point was she looked like a bloody Targaryen. You know, people that certainly don’t exist in real life.

That meant... where the hell was I?!

I bounced up from my seat— because I wasn’t on my bed as I initially thought— and looked around.

I was in some kind of fancy dining hall, the kind that I had only seen in movies. Food that clearly looked medieval, people dressing like servants, etc.

“Self... Insert...?” I mused.

No, that’s unrealistic. It’s more likely that someone staged this all up and moved me here. The only world that existed was my own. There’s no way I—

“What’s the problem, Alicent?” The Targ-looking man sitting at the head of the table asked.

Ali...cent?

Oh, God.

This was bullshit—

I grabbed the shiny plate in front of me and poured away all the food on it.

The face reflected was unfamiliar and clearly western.

“Ahhhh! Nooooo!” My scream could be heard in the whole castle.

———

So, there’re three possibilities.

1) Someone very rich and very crazy set this up: They put me through surgery and hired many people for this.

2) I was Self-inserted into Westeros.

3) Dream, the lamest answer, and the one I was hoping for.

If it’s only a dream, I could do whatever I wanted. But...

If someone set this up, there’s nothing I could do but to play along until they’re satisfied with me. However, if it’s not some kind of sick joke, then I’d need to settle into my role so I wouldn’t be sent to the Westeros equivalent of a madhouse, whatever that was.

I sighed. Why was I SIed into Alicent Hightower of all people?

By the way, after that outburst I was checked by the Maester-whose-name-I-did-not-get, I was given some meds and forcefully locked into what I presumed was Alicent’s room.

He said my “mild mental unstableness” was likely caused by the recent birth of Prince Aemond.

Aemond One-Eye.

I buried my head into my hands. Whhhyyy? Why Westeros? Why the Dance era? Why now?

Why me?

Sure, I might have thought about writing a SI. But a bunch of people had done so too. None of the SIs I tried to write had ever seen the light...

Well, unlike some of those lucky-unlucky SIs, I didn’t have any of Alicent’s memories. If I had I could be sure this was really a SI situation, but no.

I... still felt that this wasn’t SI. I felt comfortable— no, that’d be a wrong word, but I didn’t feel that this wasn’t my own body. Even if we’re the same gender and around the same age, wouldn’t it still feel weird to be someone else?

...I supposed most SIs wouldn’t bother to describe that. But still.

The door creaked open. I looked and saw the two people who were presented at the breakfast table.

Viserys and Rhaenyra. Someone kill me now.

The little girl was pouting, obviously unwilling to ask about the well-being of her stepmother. Viserys was pulling her into the room...

Alright. Time to act.

“Aww,” I smiled at them, “Are you here to see me? Don’t worry, I’m completely fine now.”

They froze. What? Did I say something wrong?

“Alicent,” Viserys said gravely, “You’re... you’re not acting like yourself... you don’t need to pretend if you’re not feeling it.”

Okay, maybe it’s a bad idea to pretend to be the woman who I basically knew nothing about.

“Umm, yeah, I still feel awful,” I lowered my head and mumbled, “If you don’t mind, I’ll like more time to rest.”

“Yes, take some rest,” He nudged the girl’s shoulders, “Rhaenyra.”

The girl that I actually hoped not to be Rhaenyra Targaryen stepped forward and said flatly, “Get well soon, Alicent.”

“...Thanks.” Like, man, what else could I say?

Just to make the effort to be friendly, I extended a hand to pat her head, which she avoided swiftly. Sigh.

“Satisfied” with our interaction, Viserys took Rhaenyra’s hand again. “I’ll get Aegon here later.” He told me.

Hearing her brother’s name seemed to be enough to make Rhaenyra frown. For me, though...

It reminded me that I wasn’t only married to a man much older, I was also a mother of three (plus one).

“Yeah, he’ll... miss me,” I replied, my mind racing. How old Aegon was?

Aemond was born recently... so he must still be a baby, right? What’s the age difference between Aegon, Helaena, and Aemond? I didn’t remember. I wasn’t very familiar with the Dance era...

Thankfully they didn’t notice me slightly panicking and left me alone. I took a deep breath as soon as they left the room.

I didn’t know how much time I had. But I needed to come up with a strategy... and fast.

Because from now on, it’s me against this world.

———

The thing was that, I didn’t like the Dance.

If I was asked for a period to insert in, I’d probably pick pre-Blackfyre Rebellion. I really liked some of the great bastards.

Dance, meanwhile, was a period where unlikable people fought each other. With dragons, even!

Did I mention that I didn’t like dragons?

...Dragon. Actually, you know...

IF, if there’re really dragons. Then it’d have to be the real Westeros...

What if I just went and found a dragon now?

And they didn’t exactly have a reason to refuse me, right? I was their queen.

I leaped off and attempted to find the dragon pit. Outside of the door, there’s a man in white— a kingsguard.

Perfect. The man blinked, surprised to see me walked out of the room. “Your grace? You’re not supposed to—”

“Take me to the dragon pit.” I ordered. It felt so good to order someone around!

“...” He continued to blink, once, twice. “Yes, your grace.”

Thanks to this guy being the typical brainless bodyguard that kingsguards were, I arrived at the dragon pit very soon.

Unfortunately, someone was already here. Rhaenyra had her hands on her hips when she saw me, “What are you of all people doing here?!”

What a “good” timing. “Aren’t you here to ride Syrax?” That’s the name of her dragon, right? The only thing I was certain of was that it’s a fat dragon.

“...Yes.” She crossed her hands, “What do you want?”

“Nothing. Just want to see a dragon with my own eyes.”

“Huh? You’re saying like you haven’t seen a dragon?”

“I... I mean, I’d love to see you fly in the sky.”

“...That makes no sense.” She mumbled.

“Go ahead, don’t mind me.” I waved.

She stared at me for a while, then gave up and moved.

Not long later, I saw what I was seeking.

Dragon.

It’s... completely different from what I had imagined before.

Those imaginary beasts were supposed to be a picture of strength and grace. But what I saw was a twisted thing, with uneven limbs and sick-looking skin that seemed to be melting down every second.

But it’s undoubtedly real and moving. It’s no CGI effects, no puppets.

I was... in Westeros.

...No, if someone had the money to create a Westeros like environment, perhaps they had the technology to create fake dragons too?

Once Rhaenyra and her dragon landed, I approached them.

“What are you doing?” She screamed when she saw me, “Get away from Syrax!”

“I just want to know...” As if in a fever dream, I raised a hand towards the dragon.

Just when my fingers were about to touch it—

It opened its mouth and bit down my right arm.


	2. Chapter 1: The Invisible Light

I saw my parents smiling at me. They’re always smiling, in my memory.

I was easy to take care of as a child, as they had told me. I never ran around, never made any trouble. It’s until I was five and went to school that they discovered my problem.

I couldn’t speak to people outside. My classmates, my teachers. The mere thought of opening my mouth made my skin crawl.

I was bullied for all my childhood. Many times, I would find my pencil case disappearing; many times, I’d need to hide in the bathroom to avoid being hit by my tormentors.

I wanted them to burn. I wanted them to feel my pain. I had thought of committing suicide and pinned the blame on them.

I... didn’t tell my parents. I didn’t want them to know... they had asked me why did I cry, but I never told them.

Mama... she’d embrace me and pat my back. “It’s fine, mama is here with you...”

But she’s not here, nor was papa. They’re—

———

“They’re... back home, right?” I murmured. Where was I?

“Mama!” A small body caught my left arm and shook it. “Mama!”

“...?” I saw a baby with... white hair...?

I wasn’t your mum, I wanted to say. But when he jumped onto my legs and cried, there’s nothing I could do but to awkwardly try to comfort him.

“It’s fine, it’s fine...” I repeated until he calmed down and stopped crying. At the same time, I looked around, trying to find help...

And I saw them. Viserys and Rhaenyra. Both seemed to be lacking sleep and utterly exhausted.

“Oh.” Dragons, Targaryens, Dance, Syrax. My arm... I...

“Your grace?” Oh right, him. Mr. Grand Maester was observing me carefully, “How’re you feeling?”

“I, ahh...” Someone had pulled me away from Syrax after that... it’s the two kingsguard around, I think? I was screaming, Rhaenyra was screaming, then...

I didn’t feel like losing an arm. Phantom limb, I guess?

...Wait, my... hand...

I looked at the baby— Aegon, I assumed— again. He seemed to be falling asleep... and I was... patting his head with my... right hand.

I tried picking up a thread of his hair.

It... floated in the air?

“What’s... with this? What happened to my hand?!” I almost shouted in fear before remembering there’s a baby in my arms.

“You don’t remember? Anyway, this isn’t my fault!” That’s not what I meant, Rhaenyra... “Criston can prove that—”

“I remember, I remember!” I would rather not have this argument. “Yes, it’s not your fault. I was being stupid. What I want to know is after Syrax ate my arm, why... why do I still have it?” As a demonstration, I picked up the goblet which was conveniently placed on my bedside. It looked like it floated in the air by itself.

...Did I read something similar before?

Facing this occult situation, our gazes converged to the Grand Maester. The man shook his head, “It’s unknown... never heard of... if your grace is willing to do some test...”

“Maybe later?” Surely not when there’s a baby here. Also, letting someone who admitted to knowing nothing to do tests on me sounded dangerous.

Apparently Viserys thought the same as me. “Contact the Citadel and see if there’re any past records,” He ordered, “And Alicent, we’ve contacted your father. Maybe there’s something in the Hightower.”

“Okay, thanks.” Although I highly doubt there’d be anything. Also, my father... he meant Otto right? Wasn’t he Hand of the King?

...Or was he dismissed already? I needed my ASOIAF wiki. It’d be nice to know what year this was, at least.

He frowned slightly. I must still not be acting like Alicent, but it couldn’t be helped. “We’ll find a solution out of this, don’t worry… I’ll take Aegon away for now. You need to rest.”

The boy was soundly asleep. I was afraid that moving him would wake him up, but Viserys easily took him away from my arms. He’s surprisingly used to take care of babies?

Then his gaze moved to his daughter. The girl crossed her arms, “Even she admitted it. I’ve nothing to do with that!”

“Rhaenyra...” He looked annoyed and tired. How many times did they have this conversation when I was out?

“Sorry for bringing you all this trouble.” I held out a hand— my left hand, “I won’t approach your dragon again. May we reach an accord?”

She widened her eyes, “Huh? You...”

“Truly, I don’t want to bring you any unpleasant memories.” I maintained the same position. Under the pressure of her father, she finally took my hand. I shook it firmly, once, twice, before letting go.

Progress?

With this settled, I was left alone again. Well, actually Viserys had asked if I wanted my ladies-in-waiting to be here, but I refused.

There’s something I needed to test.

I held out my right arm. “Extend.” I whispered. My target was the wall around one metre from me. “Ex-tend!”

Nothing happened. The only thing my invisible fingers touched is air.

“Hmph.” I put down my hand. So, it wasn’t the kind of superpower I had seen in light novels.

Just, invisible hand.

What the hell?

That’s completely not something in-universe of ASOIAF!

Was I dreaming after all?

...When I thought about it, I was thinking and speaking in English/Common, too. All of these... felt so convenient.

I tried to recall what I was doing before coming to Westeros. I remembered I was on the MTR, going to...

Where?

Cold sweat dripped from my forehead.

I didn’t remember. No matter how I searched my memory, there’s no trace of my destination.

I was... I was. My memories...

I recalled my parents’ faces. The only people I could rely on.

Had I... properly said goodbye before leaving home?

There’re many holes in my memories. I remembered school. I remembered browsing forums and writing. I remembered the lockdown I had gone through. But I felt that there’s something important...

Headache attacked me like swarms invading. I scratched my head, my nails dug into my scalp.

I—

_ “Believe in yourself! And as long as you can, don’t stop believing!” _

...That’s right.

“I... am here.” I yelled, “I’m right here. No matter what, I’m still here!”

Suddenly the door opened. The white cloak ran in, “Your grace, did something happened? I heard... you... shouting?”

Oops. I was so embarrassed that I wanted to dig a hole and hide.

“Nothing, Ser, nothing.” I waved him away. “You can go now. I want to rest.”

“But...” The knight— wait, was that a different one from that one earlier? He stood there looking confused, but I persisted in pushing him away.

It’s until around ten minutes later that I convinced him to go away and not to inform anyone of my outburst.

“Ah well...” I couldn’t seem to do anything without messing it up. Story of my life, really.

But I could still do something.

“Haha…” I laughed.

I didn’t know why I was here... but if I could stop the Dance—

If I could change things—

Whoever put me here had no idea who they’re putting in power.

“Let’s mess things up even more.” I vowed to myself. I would make it count this time.

_ This time... _


	3. Chapter 2: Big Sign of Love & Peace

The rest of my night consisted of more testing (almost knocking down the candle in the process).

For all I could find out, it’s just a normal arm except for being invisible. I could feel heat and cold, and it didn't have special strength or anything.

Well, there’s one thing: my blood from it was invisible too. It took three tries to poke my finger, and the result was a ring of floating bandages following me around. Maester Nameless was very interested in my wound and didn’t mind being woken up at night.

I was sure that he would pull out a test tube and take samples from me any second.

The next morning, when I was at the breakfast table, I could see everyone pretending not to stare at my missing arm.

“...” Honestly, this sucks. All I wanted in life was to blend in and disappear.

Sadly, life was unfair. Might as well as to be me if people were going to stare no matter what.

I couldn’t help but yawn as I sat down. “Good morning~” I hardly got any sleep last night.

“Alicent, your hand...” Viserys’ eyes were focused on that ring of bandages. I thought he would be informed already by the maester... maybe he’s afraid that he wouldn’t get a chance to experiment on me?

“Oh, this? Don’t worry, I just accidentally poked my finger.” That’s what I told the maester, anyway.

“...Be careful.” He looked like he didn’t believe me. What, I couldn’t have a sudden urge to do embroidery in the midnight?

...Okay, yeah, that’s a stretch.

I grinned as I laughed at my own joke inwardly. I was suspicious, to begin with, it wouldn’t matter much even if he didn’t believe my lie.

Anyway, time to eat! I’d spare you from the detailed description, apart from it looked absolutely unhealthy and tasted even more unhealthy. Yum yum.

My ravenous gorging, however, attracted more attention. When I looked up, I saw Rhaenyra looking at me with utter disgust and Viserys with extreme confusion. It’s not just them; everyone in the dining hall was staring at me.

“Are you sure you’re alright?”

“I‘m starving,” I pouted slightly, “I haven't eaten anything since yesterday noon.”

“Ah, that’s true.” He nodded. “Do indulge in yourself then.”

“But of course!” I did my best to ignore the stare from both of them for the rest of the meal. Ahh, this was satisfying.

Energy refilled, I lazily stood up with a full belly. Hmm, I was feeling sleepy again. It would be really nice if I could go back to my room and nap until noon...

In fact, why didn’t I just do that? Screw befriending Targs, I needed my beauty sleep.

“Alicent,” Viserys called behind me.

“Mmm?” I squeezed out a lazy smile. “Yes?”

“Are you sure you’re feeling fine?” His brows knitted in concern, “I was against it before, but perhaps we should let the Grand Maester check you up and give you something.”

Letting our resident mad scientist drug me? No thanks. “Ahh, don’t be such a worrywart,” I smiled sweetly, “I’m totally fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” I yawned, “If you’re so worried, I’ll go and take more rest.” This was what I was planning to do anyway.

While I was unsteadily tracing my steps back to my room (Ser Unknown following me looking increasingly confused), a maid stopped me.

“Your grace, Prince Aegon is crying for you... usually you would visit him around this time...”

Ahh, how could I forget that I was the mother of Prince Crybaby? Thankfully she led us to the nursery so I didn’t need to search for it myself.

I wanted to escape the moment I opened the door. Was this a crying competition?

Between the cries of “mama”, two other babies— Helaena and Aemond, no doubt— were also joining in the match. I wanna cry too.

I had never dealt with babies before, as I was the youngest even in family gatherings. Also, my ears were extremely sensitive.

Which meant that I needed to deal with this before my headache consumed me.

“Mama is here,” I announced as I stepped into the room. Noise Creator #1 broke into a smile when he saw me, so that’s one problem solved.

In the next few minutes, I focused on calming him down and cleaning his tears-ridden face. In the background, somehow the crying competition grew to be even more fierce. Why weren’t the maids helping me with this?

“Mama...” Aegon sniffed, “I thought you’re gone...”

“Mama’s here now, I’m not going anywhere.” I kissed his forehead. “But give me a minute.”

He blinked as I carefully let him go, but didn’t resume crying. Good.

Now, how should I do this? One baby— Helaena? its clothes were pink— Was crying so hard that its face was all red, so I guessed I should deal with it first...

The Red-face baby cried even louder when I approached it. Please. What mum said she did when I was a baby, again?

I assumed the babies were well-fed and cleaned, given that they had nursemaids... so what did they want?

“Mmm... see?” I covered my face with my left hand, “Nobody is here!” And took it off, “And now mama’s here!”

Did it work? The baby was staring at me with round violet eyes, seemingly forgotten its previous actions.

Success?

Carefully I stepped away from its cradle. It didn’t cry again... wow, couldn’t believe that the oldest trick worked.

Well then, the last one.

Noise Creator #3 was still crying out loud even when it had won the contest. If I got it right, this one was Aemond. Suited what I knew of him, I supposed.

My head was reaching its limit within seconds. It’s time to use the killing move.

I covered its mouth with my right hand. All noises were gone in an instant.

“...?” The baby was stunned. It blinked, its small hands struggling to find out what exactly was stopping it from crying.

I released its mouth before it could catch my hand. It opened and closed it mouth for servals times, before taking a deep breath—

I covered its mouth again. The same reaction occurred. Slowly, I turned from covering to patting its mouth. Being amazed by its own voice change, it finally forgot to cry.

Haah, it’s done. I cursed Viserys and Alicent for having so many babies and turned back to Aegon.

“It’s done now. Is there anything you’d want mama to do with you?” I forced out a smile and kneeled in front of him.

He blinked. What, was that the first time he was asked that question? I supposed he might have just listened to the adult's orders before...

He pulled me by my sleeves towards a pile of toys in the corner of the room. Of course, I should have seen this coming.

Tiny wooden dragons and tin warriors. Cute, although a bit too Targaryen for my taste.

He picked up a dragon and me a tin warrior. I thought it’s usually the parent who played the dragon that should be defeated... but instead, should I play some guy to be burned to death? How awful.

The dragon flew towards me with sound effects. “Rawr!” Was this supposed to be him raging fire? Either way, I dodged it easily by lying flat on the floor.

“Ehh?” Missing his attack seemed to freeze the dragon. It’s time for my counter-attack!

“Superpower— Invisible Hand!” I snatched the dragon from Aegon’s hands.

“This is cheating!” His eyes started to well up. Shit.

“Sorry... how, how about a round two?” I quickly said.

He nodded, “Mama, don’t cheat again.”

Crisis averted.

———

The rest of my morning was spent entertaining the three babies until it’s time for them to be fed. I, thankfully, didn’t need to do it myself.

“Haaah~” This was more exhausting than my morning lessons. If I ever went back to the real world, reminded me not to have any children.

“...Are you not going to eat?” Oh right, I forgot that I was on the dining table again.

I couldn’t help but yawn again before answering, “I’m not hungry. Perhaps I ate too much at breakfast.”

“Okay...” Rhaenyra’s eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Wait, I want to talk to you,” I called out when she attempted to leave.

“What?” She unhappily turned to face me. At least put on a veil of civility, wouldn’t you?

“After yesterday’s accident, I realised I have been antagonising you unintentionally. I would never try to be a mother for you, but perhaps we could be friends like we used to?” How was this speech?

“Huh? What’re you planning?” Unsurprisingly, it didn’t work.

“Nothing! I just... umm... have a change of mind? I’m now a champion of love and peace!” Hastily, I made out a heart symbol with my hands. “See? Love and Peace!”

“...” She was at a loss of words. “What even— what does that mean? You must have hit your head too, none of your words make any sense. And what’re you trying to make with your hand?”

“A heart...?” It’s then I noticed two things: One, the heart symbol probably wasn’t a thing in Westeros; Two, I only had one hand visible.

“Ahaha... that’s embarrassing.” I laughed dryly and retreated my hands. “Just, at least consider it? I don’t want to spend the rest of my life being your enemy.”

Her mouth fell open. “...Argh, whatever. Fine.” She grudgingly said, rolling her eyes.

Yeah~ I did it!

“What are your plans this afternoon? Let’s spend some time together.” Gotta strike while the iron was still hot.

The corner of her mouth quirked up. “Dragon riding.”

“...Oh.”

“You aren’t going to follow me this time, are you?”

“No, please go and enjoy yourself.” Okay, yeah, change of plans. Perhaps I’d actually go back to sleep.

She flashed a winning look, then left with her kingsguard (Who had been staring at the whole scene with dumbfounded expression). Speaking of which, was that Cole?

“Ah well~” He would be a problem going forward, but wasn’t an immediate one. Otto was coming back to King’s Landing, Daemon was somewhere out there, team Velaryon...

Hell, I couldn’t properly deal with Viserys. What if one day he decided it’s high time I stop messing around and fulfill my wifey duties? I was so not going to have more children. Sorry Daeron, you weren’t going to ever exist.

But hey, at least I made a friend!

Mom and dad would be proud.


	4. Chapter 3: Between Malice and Deceit

It’s after I had transferred to my new school that I made my first friend.

My parents heard of the bullying in school not from me, but from other parents. They in turn learned from their own children. Perhaps there’s someone who’s sympathetic to me after all, but it no longer mattered.

The new school was certainly better. The classmates there didn’t beat me. But the core issue remained the same: I was an outsider who couldn’t talk to people.

Three months after transferring, I was still isolated. I was ready to accept that’s what my life would always be... alone.

It’s then she started to talk to me.

“Hey... you seem familiar. We’re from the same kindergarten, aren’t we?”

I didn’t recognize her. But when she sat beside me at lunchtime, I could hardly refuse her.

Slowly I started to open up. I realized that I could talk if someone was willing to listen. In hindsight, I should be thankful that she healed my fear of speaking.

I still remembered that we would sing together on the school bus. It’s, no doubt, a happy memory.

Yet that lasted less than one month.

———

When I thought about it, I had never approached someone and tried to befriend them.

I didn’t have an interest in other people. That one time I made a friend, she was the one who came and talked to me. Not that it ended well...

What I was trying to say was, bothering Rhaenyra every day like this was a new experience for me.

I wasn’t so stupid to believe that she would think of me as a friend just because she said so. Hence, I was twisting my brain for something that would impress her.

If I was being honest, I didn’t think I like her much. She was that kind of girl who cares about her appearance more than anything when I often went around in my pajamas.

I supposed we’re just not very compatible. Half of the time I tried to spend time with her, she went out for dragon-riding.

But not today!

“What is this?” Rhaenyra frowned, her lips pressed together, “Father, I don’t think this is safe.”

“I have tried it out with Alicent already, this is actually fun,” Viserys said, “You’d love it.”

She glared at me and I smirked. She couldn’t run when her father was involved, and as Viserys’ wife, making him agree with this idea of a family day was rather easy.

There’s some prep work, for example, I delegated the actual job of racks and tiles production to our dearest maester (who agreed to keep it a secret after examining my arm again).

After it’s done, I brought it to Viserys first to have a test playing section. He was certainly surprised by my suggestion, but after a few playthroughs, he gladly agreed to introduce it to his daughter.

“I’m proud to announce my latest creation,” By that, I meant I was a thief who paid no attention to copyright, “Rummikub!”

Behold, uplifting! ...Not really.

I was just creatively bankrupt and couldn’t think of anything I would do with a friend. Rummikub was supposed to bring people together, its tag line said so.

“That name tells me nothing about it apart from your taste.” Rhaenyra snapped, “What do we do with this?”

“Well, you will see in a minute. First, we each take a rack...” The rules of Rummikub were very simple. Thank God that Westeros miraculously used Arabic numerals too, otherwise, I would be in huge trouble.

...I wondered how it came to Westeros? Who invented it?

Rhaenyra’s face was like she swallowed an unripe orange while she followed my instructions. We each took our tiles and placed them on our own racks.

“...For the first time and only the first time, the set must have at least thirty points. Do you get it?”

“I do.” From her dark expression, I was sure she would say that even if she didn’t actually understand. No matter, we would know when she put down her first set.

“Then I’ll go first, to give you an example.” Luckily, I had the right tiles.

Four nines. She seethed when I put it out, to my silent amusement.

Viserys put down a set of blue nine to eleven, with a joker replacing the ten. I was certain he knew how to play after our section yesterday.

Rhaenyra stared at her rack for several minutes, her gaze getting more and more intense. Technically there’s a time limit in Rummikub, but I wasn’t going to follow it here when I never did at home.

Though, maybe I should warn her earlier that it’s common to be unable to make a move in this game. Fifteen minutes later, I finally said, “Take a tile from the pool and move on, Rhaenyra.”

“No!” She refused to look at me and kept staring at her rack. I was starting to believe this was a bad idea.

I looked at Viserys, who must be also regretting his decision. “Rhaenyra, you’re taking too long. Just take a tile.”

Her face was all red with anger when she obeyed her father’s order. It’s my turn now...

I took a tile. I told you it’s hard to make a move in the early stage.

Viserys did the same. Rhaenyra glared at me before taking a tile. Such a cycle continued for two loops until she triumphantly made her first move.

Three twelves, in red, blue, and yellow. Common opening.

“Nice,” I commented. She puffed up her cheeks, not happy to be complimented by me.

I wasn’t just complimenting her, though. I put down my black twelve, completing the set.

And so on and so on. When I thought about it, this was inherently unfair to Rhaenyra, who just learned the rules. I should have suggested that she share a rack with Viserys and play against me.

But even so, I wasn’t going to throw the game to please her. There’s no greater disrespect than throwing the game for your opponent’s sake.

It’s going to cost me big time.

The game ended with my absolute victory. Her expression was dark enough that I was glad that she didn’t have a dragon with her. I severely underestimated her competitiveness...

“You did well, Rhaenyra,” Viserys tried to comfort her awkwardly, “You made sense of those rules quickly, and that move when you stole the joker near the near was a good play.”

She stared at her father blankly, then said, “...Once more.”

“Huh?”

“Once more! I’ll defeat you!” She pointed a finger at me, fire spitting out from her eyes.

...I severely underestimated her competitiveness.

“Rhaenyra!” Viserys was about to scold her, but I held a hand to stop him.

“No, that’s fun.” The corners of my mouth quirked up, “Challenge accepted. Do your best, Rhaenyra.”

She proudly lifted her head up, the defeat leaving no scratch on her face.

———

It took seven rounds for her to win (Oh, and Viserys won once too), and by that time I was so tired that my head was spinning. Next time if we play again, we have to set a number of rounds beforehand.

Rhaenyra left with high spirits. Good for her, but for now I really needed to rest.

“Mmm~” After putting the tiles and racks back in a box, I yawned, “I think I’ll go back to sleep now. Bye-bye.”

He blinked. Was I acting too casual here? But he must also be tired too after so long. We had been playing all day, surely he would excuse some impoliteness.

“You can stay,” He said and scared all the sleepiness out of me.

“You... uhh... I’m sure we’re both exhausted... this may not be the best idea...” My terrified stutter wasn’t helping my case!

“You look like you’re going to faint. Are you sure you can walk back without a problem? I know you don’t like it when others touch you...” He had only worry on his face.

So, it was just that. I almost sighed in relief. “It’s fine, I can handle it... thanks for putting up with me, Viserys.”

A slight frown, then a smile. “No, I’m glad that you’re putting effort into getting along with Rhaenyra.”

“Well, I would rather not have her as an enemy. She has proven herself to be a formidable opponent today.” I joked.

He chuckled warmly, “I’m proud of her.”

“Once our kids grow up, we can all play together.” That’s kind of my end goal: a picture of a perfectly normal happy family. I bet it wouldn’t go so smoothly, however.

“That would be nice.”

I felt that there’s something else he wanted to say, but he sent me away all the same. It’s just me, or was he avoiding getting intimate with me too?

I wanted to think more about it, but I fell asleep immediately after my head touched my pillow. I was just too tired.

———

I had Ser Queensguard carried my box of Rummikub when I went to visit Rhaenyra. She seemed genuinely interested in the game last week, so maybe we could play again?

I was in shock upon stepping into the room.

Inside, a dwarf with a silly hat was speaking with a high-pitched voice, “Oh, ohhh, my hand! Look, my hand is invisible now!”

Mushroom... how could I forget my least favorite dwarf in Westeros’ history?

Rhaenyra’s giggles stopped when she spotted me before the Fool. “Alicent... I...” Her eyes were widened in fear. So, she at least knew that she was wrong?

My heart was beating rapidly, bumping my blood as I stepped forward. The Kingsguard... Cole stood in front of Rhaenyra. Oh, Cole, you thought I meant to harm her?

I... only wanted... I...

———

My first friendship ended with me discovering my pen in her pencil case.

I had lost the pen a few days prior to my discovery. I clearly remembered how it looked, and the scratch I had made when I accidentally dropped it to the floor.

It’s definitely mine. I accused her of stealing, which she fervently denied. Naturally, it ended with me bringing this to the teachers, and they called her parents to know whether she owned that pen.

They confirmed that she didn’t.

She got punished, and I lost a friend.

To this day, I still couldn’t fathom her motivation. She wasn’t from a poor family which couldn’t afford to buy a pen, and she had never expressed that she wanted it.

Hell, if she told me that she just picked it up on the road and put it in her pencil case for safekeeping, I would probably believe her.

But I never got an answer. I only learned that... I couldn’t trust people.

———

“Mushroom,” I gritted my teeth, “Is this really so funny?” I ticked one of the bells on his hat with my invisible hand. It rang clearly in the silence of the room.

The dwarf had the gall to grin, “Everyone is funny, but Mushroom is the funniest.”

I had to take a deep breath to suppress my urge to punch him. “From now on, I don’t want to see you in the same room I’m in,” I ordered, “Get out.”

Rhaenyra didn’t counter-ordered when the Fool left, her face paled and her mouth pulled into a hard line. She was holding Cole’s hand, who was observing my every move carefully.

“Rhaenyra,” I called out, the malice in my voice surprised even myself, “Is this really so funny? You were there. You must know that getting a dragon to bite off my arm isn’t funny.”

“I don’t... it’s just...” She struggled to pull out an explanation. Of course. _She_ didn’t manage to explain herself, too.

“I’m used to being the laughingstock,” Something bitter rose from my throat, “So I won’t hold this against you more than I did others. I still don’t want to be your enemy.”

But...

“However, I don’t think we can be friends. Not anymore.” I announced.

History... always repeat themselves. I could never have friends... even in the Land of Nowhere.


	5. Intermission 1: Ideal Hypothesis

**The Princess’ Knight**

Alicent Hightower came and left like a storm. Rhaenyra squeezed his hand and whispered, “What should I do? If she brings this to father...”

It’s rare that his little princess panicked so much. “Mushroom played his act without your input or permission,” Criston quickly reassured her, “The King won’t punish you.”

She looked even more anxious, “She saw me laughing. This will never work even if it’s the truth.”

“It’s Mushroom, everyone laughs at him. It wasn’t a crime to laugh at the Fool.” Seeing her frown made him wish to extend a hand to smooth it. But he wouldn’t do that as her knight.

He kneeled beside her so that their gaze matched, “If it comes up, I’ll prove to the King that you had no ill intention,” He promised, “We could make Mushroom the one to blame.”

“Criston, you understand me, don’t you? I didn’t mean to... I like the new her better. She’s annoying but not malicious, unlike before.” Her face was sullen.

It broke his heart to see her so troubled. “Do you want to apologize to her, then?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t even done anything but laugh, but she made me feel like I have done something wrong... maybe I should find father before she does.”

He held both her hands in his, “I’ll support you whatever you choose.”

She forced out a smile, “I know I can trust you, Criston.”

**The Grand Maester**

Runciter had never thought he would find such a case to ignite his flame for study and research again.

Even now he was turning over old documents, trying to find anything relevant to his discovery.

He had this question the first time he could examine the queen’s invisible arm. Her pinky finger. Was it always crooked?

He checked it finger by finger, the second time she came around. The more he checked, the more he’s certain that her hand wasn’t like this before the incident.

Her invisible arm was different, that’s what he thought before she came to ask for his favor.

She agreed to let him examine her arms again in exchange for her little game. This time, he took measures of all of her fingers on her right hand, then he took the measurements of her left hand too for comparison.

He noticed it when he moved to the pinky finger of her left hand.

It’s... also crooked.

He couldn’t believe his own eyes. No matter how he looked at it, her pinky was perfectly straight.

But when he held it, trying to take measurements, it felt crooked.

He took a ruler and put it beside her pinky finger. They’re both completely straight, but...

“Umm, are you done? My left arm isn’t even invisible...” The queen had looked confused. Did she not know that her body had... changed? Or...

She had left soon and he was left to his own thoughts. He looked through everything he had restlessly until he found a document about Asshai.

Shadowbinding. He had a hypothesis...

What if it’s an illusion... a glamour all along?

Then it’s not Alicent Hightower who’s there—

But an imposter who wore her face.

**The Watcher**

Every day, she waited for him.

She had glanced into the future and saw their ending, yet she didn’t desire to change it. All her life, she yearned for the time they would share.

That’s what she wanted, but then everything changed.

She could feel the difference immediately. The air, the trees, the sky. Even herself. Everything was... rewritten.

She feared for him, so she started searching. Looking, gazing for a glimpse of their future.

What she saw was completely different from before.

“Oh... oh my, oh my...” Such an ideal future...

She looked, bit by bit, for what caused this deviation. Until she found her.

Then she laughed.

“Ahaha, ahahaha!”

How perfect and elegant... what a tragedy!

“You will yield him to me, Interloper.” She whispered with a smile.


	6. Chapter 4: The Tower Lookout

“Mmm~” I turned the quill in my hand, wondering what to draw.

“Mmm~” Aegon, please. You shouldn’t be imitating me!

Today I decided to hold a drawing section— to train that small muscle of his and boost creativity. Education 101.

It sounded good on paper, but I forgot how messy this could be. The amount of time I needed to wipe Aegon’s face was ridiculous. I hated ink so much.

I sighed. At least he’s having fun. What he was drawing, anyway? I only saw a puddle of ink.

“A dragon!” Of course. What did I expect?

I was starting to think that all this dragon imaginary was bad for their development. They needed to think of themselves as human beings instead of fire-breathing beasts.

Screw this, let’s draw some non-dragon animals. I doodled a snake, its tongue long and sharp. After some thoughts, I added a pair of goggles on its eyes.

It’s pretty relaxing. Not long later, my piece of parchment was full of weird snakes. My mind wandered and I started thinking...

I haven’t talked to Rhaenyra since that day. What Viserys and others thought of my shift in attitude, I didn’t know.

I poured my time on the babies. If I raised them right, there might not be a Dance...

Still, I kept thinking back on that day. The things I had said and done. Had I been too rash in calling Rhaenyra out? Should I pretend to not have heard anything?

“...” I gritted my teeth.

It’s impossible. I spent my youth hearing people laughing at me. As if I wasn’t sitting right in front of them. After leaving high school, I promised myself I wouldn’t let this happen anymore...

“ _ Believe in yourself! _ ” The line kept circulating in my mind sounded so ironic now.

What was the “myself” I should believe in? Was I supposed to just accept being laughed at?

“Hmm,” Let me ask for a third-party opinion, “Aegon, is mama funny?”

He stopped his hand and looked at my face. Then he nodded, “Yes!”

...I should have worded this better. Looking at the happy stars in his eyes, I didn’t want to ask further. It’s stupid to ask a baby anyway.

Seeing the... another dragon he was drawing, I sighed and picked up the quill again. Tomorrow would be a big day...

———

Otto Hightower looked much younger than I had expected. In my mind, he’s an old man, but here he seemed younger than my dad.

I supposed he must have Alicent in his youth... just like the rest of Westeros.

I hated Westeros.

Our eyes met and his expression darkened. What? I haven’t done anything!

“Alicent,” The first thing he did was to ask, “What’s with your hair?”

“My... hair?” I took a pinch of hair in my invisible hand. It’s brown now, something I was still getting used to. “What about it?”

“See what your appearance is like? Your hair's all down and disheveled. You’d never step out of your chambers without making your hair before.”

Oh, that. I refused to let anyone make my hair because my scalp was sensitive. In hindsight, people probably didn’t call me out only because I was their queen.

“I...” Quick, came up with an excuse!

“You must be scared witless,” Oh? His tone softened as he prompted me to come closer, “How’s your hand?”

“It’s fine, just... invisible.” I held out my arm at his indication.

He gingerly touched it, feeling out its shape. “You have suffered.”

“Umm... yeah.”

“What happened to Syrax?”

“...Nothing? It remains in the dragon pit.” Hopefully, it didn’t gain an appetite for human flesh.

“I’ll make her pay.” He coldly promised.

“Um, what?” Before the words could leave my mouth, he clapped my shoulders and moved forward. Two men in grey also stepped forward and grabbed me, preventing me from chasing after him.

“Sister, you have suffered.” Mr. Unknown Hightower said. Did you people have anything else to say?

“It’s okay,” I said, attempting to slip through their grips, “I feel completely fine now...”

“We’ll stay here to protect you from now on.” The other guy who I presumed was also Alicent’s brother said.

“Thanks, but I don’t think this is necessary.” Please, if you stayed here, you might blow my cover. I didn’t even know your name!

“Don’t force yourself too hard, Alicent.” That’s not the point...

Such care I had received had caused me to miss the first part of Viserys and Otto’s conversation.

“That is too much,” Viserys said, “Syrax is a dragon, not some rabid dog to be put down.”

...Though I could easily guess what had been said.

“When it acts like a mad dog, it needs to be treated like one.” Otto insisted, “The princess hadn’t been reining in her mount.”

Please.

“I, I don’t think we should do anything to Syrax.” I interrupted quickly, “I won’t be getting near to it again.”

As much as I hated dragons, the issue of my arm really wasn’t a good reason to kill it. This was a matter of principle.

Both men were taken aback by my statement... hey, Viserys, why were you even surprised? I had told you I didn’t blame Syrax and Rhaenyra for what happened.

“Alicent, what are you saying?” Otto cried out, “Your arm was bitten off!”

“Yes, and that’s my fault, not the dragon’s!” Also, it kind of grew back.

His face flushed red then white, “Your wound must still be hurting. Myles, Gwayne, come and help your sister to rest.”

“No, I’m not, don’t dismiss me like that!” My “brothers” did come forward, but they didn’t dare to restrain me yet. I needed to fight.

I turned to Viserys, “Your grace, please don’t listen to my father. The accident was just that: an accident. No punishment needed.”

“I have no intention to punish Syrax.” He immediately said.

Seeing our play, Otto seethed, “The fact was that the dragon ate your arm. Under Princess Rhaenyra, even! What else can ensure it not to attack humans again?”

Mmm, I supposed this was a valid concern...

How about this? “What if we call Rhaenyra and go to the dragon pit again,” I suggested, “I’ll stand there and see if she can control her dragon.”

They’re, perhaps understandably, shocked. Approaching dragons suck, but I was pretty confident that Rhaenyra would be able to keep Syrax in check. And if she couldn’t... I might gain another transparent body part?

Worst case, I died.

...Surely it wouldn’t come to this?

_ Surely. _

“There’s no need for you to go yourself,” Otto said urgently, “Send someone else.”

“No, Syrax should still remember my smell. Testing with other people will be pointless.” Also, if it didn’t work, it would mean I send someone to die in my stead.

“Are you sure?” Viserys asked, his expression serious and concerned.

I nodded, despite the fear swirling in my heart. It had to be done, to settle this issue once and for all.

“Get Rhaenyra.” He ordered.

“This is madness, I won’t let you do this.” Otto caught my hand— my left hand, “You could die.”

Seeing him so mad, with his veins popping out, I couldn’t help but felt sorry for him. Sorry, your beloved daughter had died weeks ago. “I won’t. I... I promise.”

He wasn’t comforted by my assurance. His teeth were clenched, his face pale, and he started to tremble. The Hightower brothers helped to steady him, their glance full of confusion and worry.

Did he have some sort of illness that I didn’t know?

“Why are you so determined to prove the dragon’s innocence?” He demanded.

“Because... because this is the right thing to do.”

He stood there, stunned. Was this really such a weird thing to say?

“...What’s with you...?” He mumbled, “You aren’t the Alicent I have raised...”

Shit!

“I’m sorry... but this is who I am now.” I said, “People change.”

He didn’t say anything else, but his gaze kept following me.

———

“You want me to what?” Rhaenyra widened her eyes, “Are you completely mad?”

“Rhaenyra!” Viserys warned her.

I tilted my head, “Are you unwilling to do that?”

“...No,” She said hesitantly, “But...”

“Don’t tell me that even you don’t have confidence in yourself.”

“Of course, I can do it,” She declared angrily, “You’ll come back untouched.”

“Great, let’s go.” That’s easy enough...

There were more people in the pit now— the Hightowers, of course, but I also saw more guards standing around. Were they added after my incident, or they’re specifically rearranged for this test?

Rhaenyra climbed on the back of the beast. Truth to be told, the mere sight of that creature caused me to feel nauseous.

I really, really hated dragons.

I wouldn’t shed a tear if all dragons in Westeros dropped dead right this moment.

But dying because of me... this wasn’t right.

Was I only doing this to make myself feel better? Maybe.

I didn’t care.

I took a step towards the dragon.

My legs were weak and shaking like jelly. But still, I walked towards the hot dead trap with sharp teeth.

My gaze matched Rhaenyra’s.

_ What do you think, girl? _

_ Do you want to kill me here? _

A dragon rider was linked to their mount, wasn’t it?

_ You can kill me if you want. _

What I was betting on...

Was that... she wouldn’t harm me.

“Stop!” Behind me, somewhere far away, Otto screamed, “This is enough!”

When I looked back at him, who was trying everything to stop me from approaching the dragon, I almost saw the image of my dad.

_ My papa. _

He would have stopped me too.

But I needed to do this. Because this was what  _ you _ had taught me.

_ To be... a good person. _

“Papa,” I found myself saying, “I’m sorry.”

When I turned back to face the dragon, tears had wet my cheeks.

In my fuzzy vision, I only saw a mess of gold in front of me, heat steaming from every part of its flesh.

Fire made flesh.

I stood there, watching its every squirm. Slowly, but surely, it wiggled closer to me.

“Syrax!” Rhaenyra screamed.

My heart was throbbing like crazy. Was I wrong after all? Could she not control the hunger of her dragon?

Something touched my right arm. It’s sticky and hot.

Syrax...

I held my breath. This was the moment of truth.

After what felt like an eternity, the dragon turned its head away, as if it lost all interest in me.

I dropped on the ground immediately. Rhaenyra jumped off the dragon’s back, “I told you you would be fine!”

“That’s so close,” I murmured as the guards around helped me to my foot, “I’m never getting close to a dragon again. Never—”

“Alicent!” I was put under Otto’s embrace attack, “You’re never, never putting yourself in danger again!”

...So, he really cared. I thought he’s a proto-Tywin... couldn’t judge a book with its cover, huh?

“I’m sorry, father, I’m fine now,” I kept saying, “Everything is good now. Everything...”

Alicent’s brothers came to celebrate my survival too, and it took a while for Otto to release me.

It’s only after that that I saw Viserys standing in front of me. He was smiling, yet there’s also something else in his eyes...

“Alicent,” he called, “Thank you. And...” he held out a hand, “Welcome back.”

I instantly took it, “My pleasure.” I smiled.


	7. Chapter 5: Maybe It’s Not

After returning to the Red Keep, Otto had insisted on me to be checked through again, with the help of another maester he brought from Oldtown in addition to the Grand Maester.

I conceded in the hopes of not pissing him off, yet this second maester kept asking questions that annoyed me.

“Could you count from one to ten?”

“Could name the seat of House Hightower?”

“Could you describe the sigil of House Tyrell?”

And so on and so on. Did he think it’s my brain that the dragon ate?

What’s worse was that when he asked me who’s the current head of House Hightower, I didn’t know.

“Ahh, mmm, that would be my uncle...” I thought Otto was the brother of the Lord of Oldtown? Or did that Lord Hightower die already?

The maester nodded, but I wasn’t out of the woods yet. “And what’s his name?”

Shit, how would I know? Did we even have the name of this guy in the lore?

Seeing my panicking, Otto said gravely, “Enough. It’s just as I’ve thought... you don’t remember.”

“I... I just suddenly don’t... give me some time and I’ll recall it!” Surely, I could find a copy of the lineage of House Hightower somewhere...

He sighed heavily, “Maester, what is your diagnosis?”

“Selective amnesia, which usually occurs after head trauma or experiencing a traumatic event. Some people experience a change of personality in addition to memory loss.”

“That explains it. Runciter, do you agree?”

“We haven’t thought of examining her grace’s mental status as the injury wasn’t located on her head,” the old man said thoughtfully, “But it could be.” He carefully glanced at me.

“However, there’s currently no medical solution to amnesia... the only thing I could recommend is to rest and let the lost memories come back naturally.”

“I know,” Again, Otto sighed, “I’ll stay here until you recover. Now, how much do you actually remember?”

“I...” Ahh, he’s not giving me a chance to talk myself out.

But I supposed it was better this way? This would explain my little inconsistencies beautifully and he wouldn’t suspect me of, say, being a faceless woman.

“I... don’t remember... living in Hightower... my childhood, everything.” I lowered my head, “For all I know, my life started a few weeks ago...” The best part about this was that it’s technically true.

“Why did you hide it?” He changed into a softer tone.

“I didn’t want to be sent to... a madhouse.” Wait, was that even a thing in Westeros?

“I won’t let anyone send you away. For all, we know of your husband, he wouldn’t too.”

Well, yeah, probably. “I just didn’t know what to do...” I started to sob, “I was so afraid, father...”

Fake crying was an art, you know? The tears I had so diligently gathered tripped down my cheeks, and so Otto hurriedly embraced me and pat my back.

“I understand now, we don’t blame you.” He comforted me, “Pull yourself together. You’ll remember it all one day, don’t be afraid.”

“Thank you... could you promise me to put the Rhaenyra and Syrax issue aside?” Was I pushing him too far? But if I didn’t do this now, I might not get a chance later.

“You lost not only your hand but also your memories.” He argued.

“Surely like my arm, my memories will return one day.” They wouldn’t, but shhh.

He let go of me and looked into my eyes, and it’s just then I noticed how much older and tired he was compared to just a few hours ago. “You’re so stubborn... consider this settled for now. There’s nothing I could do to them after your interference.”

“Really?” From the bitterness of his voice, I knew he’s not happy with this, but I was still surprised that he agreed so easily. Was he lying?

Seeing my doubt, he snorted, “We’ll focus on your memory now. Your brothers and I will tell you everything you’ve forgotten.”

“Okay...” Looks like I had gotten myself some boring history and politics lessons.

———

“So that’s your real condition. I knew you lost some memories, but so much of it...” Viserys said apologetically.

“Mmm, wait. You knew?” Not even Maester Arm-Obsessed thought of it!

“You’re a completely changed person. What else could cause it, if not a loss of memories?” Well, it could be that I was a different person, but I wasn’t going to tell you this.

“Ahh, yeah...” I scratched my hand awkwardly, “I might as well as tell you the truth... I don’t remember... I don’t remember getting married or falling in love.”

“...More or less what I expected.” Ouch. I didn’t mean to hurt, but my words struck hard on him, as for a second his face twitched. Even so, he kept up his facade of a smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll give you time to rest and remember.”

“I, I think you’re very nice, even if I don’t remember much.” I blurted out.

“...Thanks.” He gave me a more genuine smile. “If you’re feeling well enough, Rhaenyra has something she wants to tell you.”

“Ohh? Sure, let her in.” Was I finally getting some proper acknowledgment for facing the dragon?

Minutes later Rhaenyra was summoned, and I was beyond surprised to find her blushing and beaming awkwardly. “I want to apologize to you,” she said, her hands hiding behind her back, “For laughing at Mushroom’s impersonation last time. And thank you for standing up against Otto Hightower.”

I was dumbstruck. Finally! Finally, someone admitted that it’s their fault! I wasn’t prepared for this. I wasn’t...

Umm, I didn’t know what to say. This was the first time someone said sorry to me.

“...You’re not hiding a dagger behind your back, are you?” I was talking nonsense, I knew, but I really couldn’t control myself right now.

“What? Of course not!” She rolled her eyes, then quickly held out... a pair of long gloves. “This is a present for you. If you wear this, people won’t notice that your arm is invisible.”

“...That’s nice.” I picked them up; they’re made of some kind of soft silk and dyed dark green, and thankfully didn’t have any lace border that would put it to waste. My skin couldn’t stand the texture of lace.

“Why don’t you try it out now?” Viserys suggested.

I was about to since there’s no guarantee that the inside of the gloves wouldn’t pick my skin. After a bit of fumbling, I successfully put them on.

“Mmm, it’ll serve.” For now, at least. If I haven’t started to feel itchy after an hour, I should be able to wear them almost all day. “Thank you for this nice gift... where did you get it, anyway?”

“Um.” She glanced at her father. I knew it!

“Viserys, you could have given it to me yourself.” I pouted, “How much of this is your idea, and how much is Rhaenyra’s?”

“The gift was my idea,” He laughed, “But her heart is real. Won’t you forgive her?”

“I mean, yeah, of course, I will. But still....” Hey, what about this? “Rhaenyra, I’ll be busier starting from tomorrow.”

“...Yes?”

“Will you so kindly be a nice big sister and go to play with your siblings? They’re going to be terribly lonely otherwise...”

“Aegon? He’s a crybaby.” She looked disgusted. That’s a fair assessment, but wouldn’t you try to be less rude?

“He’s also somewhere around three. And he’s really cute. We all know he won’t stay cute forever... you need to take that golden opportunity to play with him before he becomes less cute.”

“You’re saying like he’s some small kitten.” She giggled.

“He’s like one, except that he can talk. Come on, spend some time with him and you’ll know am I right.”

“I should spend some time with them too,” Viserys helpfully offered, “Shall we visit the nursery together tomorrow?”

“Fine.” She reluctantly agreed, “But if it’s not fun I’ll find something else to do.”

———

“Mama! Papa!” Today was a day of full energy for the babies. Not just Aegon was up and ready, even Helaena and Aemond were awake and, miraculously, not crying.

Could we have a normal family gathering for once?

Viserys happily picked him up and asked, “Did grandpa Otto tell you we’ll come?”

Ohh that explained stuff. Especially the shiny new toy he’s holding. Was that a golden dragon?

“Hey, what happened to ‘I’m getting busy’?” Rhaenyra nudged me, “Why’re you even here?”

Well. “I’ll have to... review your performance before letting you become his official playmate.”

“This feels like a trap.” She complained.

“Come on, don’t be so suspicious. Go play with them and enjoy some quality time.”

“Right, ‘quality time’.” She rolled her eyes.

This was also the time Aegon finally noticed her. “Rhaenyra?” He’s, notably, not excited by her presence.

“...Little brother.” She said, her tone sour and dour. No wonder they didn’t like you in canon.

“Big sis Rhaenyra has decided to spend a day with you all.” I quickly injected with a wink, “Why don’t you tell us what you’re doing?”

“I’m showing Helaena and Aemond my new toy,” He excitedly showed us; as I had thought, it’s yet another bloody dragon model, made of... gold.

Otto you dumbass, who gave gold to children as toys? “Be careful not to drop it anywhere near them, they don’t know what’s edible and what isn’t yet,” I warned the boy.

His cheeks puffed up, “I know! I won’t let them touch it.”

Didn’t mean it’s less dangerous. We should move on to safer, preferably chewable toys...

Mmm. “I have an idea,” I raised a finger, “How about we get some flour from the kitchen and make our own toys with it?”

“Flour?”

“With some water, it should be moldable. Won’t last too long, but the point is to have fun!”

Rhaenyra was still frowning, but the maids were already gone to do my bidding. Moments later, a pack of flour and a bucket of water was delivered.

“Roll up your sleeves and start working, folks. This is gonna get messy!” I announced and poured all the flour into the water.

Of course, I didn’t forget to remove my gloves beforehand. “Is this going to work?” Viserys whispered.

“Join in and you’ll know. Be a nice model for the kids, won’t you?”

He forced out a smile before putting his hands into the mixture as I did.

I dug out some mixture and rolled it into a ball, then handed it to Aegon. “It’s soft and sticky!” He giggled.

“Yeah, much better than the hard metal, right? Come and get some more!”

Aegon was thrilled to do so. Rhaenyra crossed her arms, “I’m no baby. This is for babies.”

“I know you’re just afraid of getting dirty,” I tried to encourage her, “Find your inner child and embrace it, and you’ll find this is fun.”

“I don’t think— ahh!” She screamed as Aegon took a ball of mixture and threw it towards her.

...I should have seen this coming.

“Brat!” She shouted as Aegon giggled at his successful prank, not aware of the incoming danger, “I’ll end you!”

Before Viserys or I could pull her back, she grabbed a handful of mixture and flung it right towards Aegon’s face.

Yep, snowball fight, here we come.

The end result of this was the room became a complete mess, our clothes and skin decorated with white, and two happily chuckling babies who certainly enjoyed the drama we had provided.

I envied you kids, I thought as I laid down on the floor, exhausted. Viserys looked almost as tired as I did, though he had more grace and didn’t lay down like me.

Aegon smuggled close to me, not caring for a bit that his face was still completely covered in flour. “That’s fun.” He commented.

For you, I had to bite my tongue to avoid saying this out loud. Prince Mischief kept throwing more flour as we tried to calm Rhaenyra down, which went as well as expected.

“My dress is ruined,” Rhaenyra complained, “Next time I come here I need to find one dress I’d like to discard.”

...Next time?

“Are you implying that you would come here again?”

“...This is fun in a way.” She admitted rather reluctantly.

My eyes lit up. Finally, success.

And it only took facing a dragon twice!


	8. Intermission 2: Celebrated By All

**The Young Tower**

Frankly, it’s a miracle that his father’s blood vessels hadn’t burst yet.

“I would rather not have kings or queens, but this is the world we live in.” Alicent said as she yawned, “You aren’t going to convince me, father, not in a thousand years.”

Ser Otto had found himself a greater rival than Prince Daemon— his daughter. Myles would laugh at the absurdity of the situation if he didn’t see that his father was oh-so-close to slapping her.

Otto never hit her. All of her brothers including Myles himself had been whipped before, but not her. When they complained about the unfairness of it, Otto had replied, “Girls are meant to be dotted on and boys are meant to be beaten.”

He had been so unreasonably favored towards Alicent, seeing him reached his limit wasn’t something to laugh at. And the current Alicent wouldn’t take being slapped any better than the previous her.

Myles quickly stepped up, “Now that can’t be right, who would rule the peasants when there’s no kings or queens?”

“Essos seems to be working fine.” Unfortunately, the new Alicent couldn’t take a hint and shut her mouth.

But the important part was to take the topic away from the succession of the Iron Throne. “See those free cities, they have no monarchy and they practice slavery. If we abandon our system this is what it’d lead to.”

“Counterpoint: Braavos. But I know Westeros isn’t ready.” She lazily smiled, “That’s why I’ll stick around and be a good queen.”

“Good queen? You’re being an idiot,” Father snapped, “You’re wasting everything we’ve built up.”

She pouted, “Pushing Aegon as the Crown Prince ruins everything I have been building up. What good would this do? They’ve just gotten more friendly!”

This was going circular. Myles wanted to sigh. He envied Gwayne, who was working in the City Watch and thus had an excuse to not be here.

“Father... this isn’t going to work.” He said tiredly, “Alicent has a mind of her own.”

“I get you here to convince her, not to side with her,” Father took a deep breath, “We’re both running on high emotions. Take her out and cool her stubborn head.”

“That’s only you,” Alicent said, “But I’m not complaining.” Myles left with her and she immediately stretched, “Mmmwah! Finally, released from prison!”

...Myles generally agreed with his father’s conclusion that she had lost her wits as well. She was never this childish even at a young age.

“You could have agreed with father and he would let you go.” He commented.

“Lying through my teeth to give him a false impression? No thanks.” She grinned at him, “But I’ll admit, I thought you and Gwayne would have pushed the issue more with me. Turns out you two don’t even care that much.”

He shrugged, “I’d prefer Aegon as King, but we can work with Rhaenyra as well. The important part is to build a stable foundation for future development.”

She beamed, “I wholeheartedly agree. If my plan works, everyone will be happy... I just want to avoid war as much as possible.”

“I’m afraid that’s unavoidable, even if you somehow convince father. What of Princess Rhaenys’ children? And what of Prince Daemon?”

“Ahh, we’ll find a way.” She waved her hand dismissively.

Myles was certain that she had no plan at all. “If you’ve paid attention to what father said, he might be less mad at you.”

“But it’s boooring and useless,” she pouted, “Why do I need to know about the number of High Septons who were Hightowers?”

“To remind you of our close ties to the Faith.”

“But I know that already. Why didn’t father find a job for you as he did for Gwayne?”

He was stunned by this sudden change of topic. “Well, I... am not as good as a knight compared to Gwayne.”

“Don’t sell yourself short! You’re pretty smart and nice. I bet you’re better than... some knights in the kingsguard.” For example, he expected her to say, but she didn’t say more. Myles had no idea which knight in the kingsguard she believed was unworthy.

“Ha. You know me... I suppose you don’t know, but I’m a stellar example of mediocrity. Gwayne is diligent, hardworking, and noble. That’s the difference between us.”

“You’re speaking like you aren’t noble.”

“Well, if the situation arises, I’ll prioritize saving my skin before anyone.”

“That’s just being human. And I admire your honesty.” She smiled.

“Heh, I like you better this way. Less bossy and haughty.”

“Alicent Hightower... I... was a nasty person before?”

He raised a brow, “This isn’t how I’d put it. You’re proud with a sharp tongue, but you’re also caring and a great lady. Father spoiled you for a reason.”

“Ehehe, I know I’m not much of a lady now,” She smiled wryly, “But I’m glad that you like me.”

“...You should try to act like a lady instead of a child sometimes.” You’re older than me after all, he thought.

**The Hand of the King**

The mad queen had thrown everyone off their balance, and that included Lyonel.

No matter her intention, the result was Otto Hightower’s return, and he wanted his seat in the small council back.

That’s, of course, not feasible. Lyonel had done nothing to deserve being demoted, and although he held no particular enmity towards Hightower, he’d not let himself be replaced.

Hightower knew that well. After he had given up in reining in the queen’s madness, he had focused on worming himself back to the good grace of King Viserys, no doubt to eventually take Lyonel’s place.

Lyonel had been watching him with a hawk eye. He wouldn’t let Hightower have any chance of dismissing him. He couldn’t go back to be the master of law, and his children thrived in King’s Landing...

...Because they could stay far away from _her_.

She scared all his other children, but he couldn’t send her away. Everything she told him had come true, good, or bad.

Lyonel was no superstitious peasant, but even he feared what she would do if he didn’t keep her in Harrenhal.

What was the last thing she told him?

_“Burn, burn, burn.”_ She said in her high-pitch voice, _“You’ll burn if you stay here.”_

...He couldn’t return to Harrenhal, no matter what.

**The Mistress of Whisperers**

“Ha, so she went mad,” Daemon laughed, “On Rhaenyra’s dragon, even! Amazing.”

“It’d seem so,” Mysaria nodded, “That’s advantageous to us.”

“A fun distraction, at the least. It’s getting boring here. I’d have gone nuts without you.” He pulled her to his side and kissed her.

It still made her happy even after so many years.

Daemon had taken her from the slums of King’s Landing and made her someone powerful. She believed that he would have wed her if not for the Royce woman. He’s all she had... and she would give it all for him.

After they parted, Daemon whispered, “I might go back and take a look at the situation myself.”

Mysaria didn’t like where this was going. “Together? What do we do with the Stepstones?”

“You stay here and take care of it for me.” He said lightly.

_No._ Fear rose in her heart, “You’re... you’re not going to abandon me here, are you?”

He wasn’t shaken by her fear. He fully embraced her, stroked her hair, and said, “Don’t be silly. I won’t let go of such a tasty woman like you. It’ll be a waste.”

“Tasty...”

He nipped the side of her neck, “So tasty.”

“When you’re gone... I’ll be waiting for you.” She murmured.

“And you’ll always have a place in my heart, my dear.” He said as he took off her dress.


	9. Chapter 6: Half Past Eternity

_ I hid in an alley, watching the lights. The sun had set. _

_ It’s late... I should go back home. Mama and papa must be worried sick about me... _

_ But how? Everywhere was blocked. All transportation had been stopped. _

_ It’s too late— _

_ It’s far too late. _

_ I shouldn’t... I... _

_...I was a fool. _

_... _

_ “What do we do with this one?” _

_ “Ahh, it’ll be a trouble if we bring it back. ***** ** **** the ***.” _

_ “Won’t that be suspicious? **** ****...” _

_ “You still have the nerve to mention **** ****? Go get more *****.” _

_ “Okay...” _

_ ——— _

“Ha... ha... ha...” I was out of breath. I sat up, my hands desperately searched for a drink.

Shaking, I brought the goblet to my lips, but I started to cough and spit it out.

“...It’s all over the bed...” Calming down for a bit, I whimpered. I needed to get someone to clean this.

Sighing, I left my room. How many times did I have this dream?

It came to me every few weeks, ever since I’ve come to Westeros... but there wasn’t a real pattern to it. It’s all the same, I was on the street, running away from something...

...But the end of it was still unclear.

Come to think of it, it’s almost a year since I arrived in Westeros.

I had basically given up on going back home by now, but the visions from my past life still haunted me.

...Why was I hiding? What was I running from? I knew nothing about it.

However, I felt that it’s related to the reason I was self-inserted...

“Argh...” The pain from my brain sharply increased, preventing me from thinking further.

Eh, whatever. I’d just go down the hall. Everyone would be surprised to see me being the first on the breakfast table.

———

“Alicent... you’re drooling,” Viserys said.

“Mmm? Ehh, sorry.” I quickly wiped my mouth. Almost fell asleep right there.

“Almost fell asleep? You definitely fell asleep. How?” Rhaenyra’s eyes were rolled to the back of her skull, “If you fall asleep during the tourney later today, don’t blame me for laughing at you.”

“Tourney is boring.” I always hated watching sports and tourneys were no different.

“You won’t find anyone that agrees with you on that.” She said certainly.

Well, yeah, I knew. Tourneys were the big game in Westeros after all. But to me, it’s just as boring as sports day at school.

“Indeed, I’d rather not have you fall asleep during the tourney,” Viserys looked at me worriedly, “But your health is more important. Are you unwell? You don’t have to attend the tourney if so...”

“I’m fine! Just had a nightmare.” I waved away his concern, “It’s the tourney for our fifth anniversary, right? I can’t be absent.”

...Distantly, I also recalled that something happened during this tourney.

Daemon coming back, wasn’t it? He offered his crown to Viserys or something. I remembered seeing that scene in a fanfic.

I was no expert on Dance, so I wasn’t completely certain whether it’s canon or not. It could also be another anniversary tourney, but I had to be there just to be sure.

I wouldn’t let him touch Rhaenyra or my children.

After breakfast, Otto caught me before the tourney started. I knew what wanted to say before he opened his mouth.

“No, father, I won’t help you to persuade Viserys. In fact, I told him to refuse you.” Seriously, how many times was he going to bring it up?

I should know something was up back when he started to be nice to Rhaenyra. Betrothing Aegon and her? No way in hell.

He glared at me, “They get along well and it’s Targaryen tradition.”

“What happened to our supposed close ties to the Faith? That match is gross as hell. No.” I put up a big cross with my arms to establish my point.

“You’re going to be the death of me,” He said, exasperated, “What’s the point of building up their good relationship if you aren’t going to use it?”

“I’m going to use it. Just not the way you’re doing.” To ensure we don’t die horribly, of course.

Defeated, he walked away... or I thought he would, as he stopped halfway and looked at me, “There’s soup stain on the hem of your dress.”

“What... ahhh!” I must have dropped it during breakfast. Damn, it’s awfully visible on that pink. “How come no one told me before?”

“You’re the queen,” He sighed, “Do me a favor and change your clothes now.”

“Yeah, thanks, father!” I rushed back to my room. I gotta be fast otherwise I would be late!

———

...Yeah, this was boring.

I struggled to stay awake as people around me shouted and cheered. What’s so fun about this?

“Alicent, your brother is up next.” Viserys noticed my status and reminded me.

“Right, Gwayne,” I tried to sit back straight. Gwayne and some other Hightowers were on the field to defend my honor, but I still wasn’t interested.

My eyelids started to close as Gwayne was facing off Cole (wearing Rhaenyra’s favor), but then—

A great shadow covered us.

“Oh shit.” Another bloody dragon.

That thing descended to the ground, leaving just enough time for people to evacuate. On top of it, sat a man with long, wavy silver hair.

Yep, that’s the rogue prince alright.

“Daemon,” Thankfully Viserys didn’t approve, “What’s with this entrance? You almost crushed our knights!”

“No one’s hurt,” The long hair shit said as he jumped down from the dragon’s back, “I timed it well. As for the way I chose to appear... a hero has to land dramatically, you know?”

A hero? A devil, more like. Despite thinking that, his response drew a giggle out of me.

He raised his head to look at us. Huh... he’s indeed very handsome. I could see why in canon Laena and Rhaenyra would be tricked.

But I wasn’t that stupid. The evil prince’s smile deepened as he saw me on Viserys’ side, before kneeling in front of his brother.

“Dear brother, your grace,” He held out a crown, “I, Daemon Targaryen, hereby renounce my kingship to the Stepstones and Narrow Sea, and offer my crown to you as a loyal subject of the Iron Throne.”

Following canon, it’d seem. I wouldn’t let him do what he wanted. “Why’re you here?”

He innocently widened his eyes, “I heard you’re wounded in an incident, so I instantly came back to look after you. Aren’t we friends?”

“Since when?” Friends, hahaha, what a filthy liar. You’re no friend of Alicent Hightower, that I was sure.

“Ouch, how heartless.” He mockingly put a hand on his chest, “Forgetting your best friend and wingman.”

“Enough with this bickering, Daemon, Alicent doesn’t remember much about you.” Viserys said, “Come take a seat and we’ll talk of your place in court...”

———

“So, you lost your memories and gained an invisible arm? Fascinating.” Daemon said as he looked over the rack.

“...Right, ‘fascinating’. Not ‘this is horrible and I hope you recover swiftly’.” Friend, my ass.

“If not for this accident, you’d never discover your talent in designing games,” He said as he put down the last of his tile, “I win.”

“How?” Rhaenyra screamed, “This is the first time you play!”

“Dear Rhaenyra,” Daemon smirked, “I, your uncle, am very smart.”

“Well done, Daemon.” Viserys clapped.

“Are we going to ignore the truth that he has watched us for two rounds before joining himself?” And plainly sneaking hints to Rhaenyra to suck her up during that period. “My father won his first game too, and he didn’t watch us play.”

“Otto? Get him here and I can beat him too.” Daemon boasted.

“You two started to argue whenever you’re in the same room,” Viserys said, “This is the gaming night, not the debate night.”

“What a shame,” He didn’t sound disappointed at all, “Want to hear a tale of the Stepstones?”

“We’re all ears,” Rhaenyra said excitedly.

“So, I was on...” I wasn’t keen on listening. Instead, I glared at his side, thinking of what to do.

When Viserys invited him to our gaming night I was afraid of the worst, but so far, he had proven himself to be an excellent conversationalist and quite easy-going at that.

Still, I couldn’t relax. He’s a terrific foe, and he’s still clearly trying to butter up Rhaenyra. I mustn’t let them spend any time alone.

Yeah, going forward, that’s what I’d do. Determined, I moved my gaze from Daemon’s face and found out that Viserys was staring at me, frowning.

“Eh? Did something stick to my face again?” I swear, I had wiped my face, but they just wouldn’t go away.

He shook his head and smiled, “No, nothing. It’s getting late, I’m thinking it’s time to retire.”

“Good point,” I yawned, “Storytime is over, Rhaenyra. Time to return to your room and sleep like the good girl you’re.”

“Huh? But it’s just getting good!” She protested.

“You’ll have all the time to hear about it tomorrow,” Surprisingly Daemon agreed with me, “Go to sleep and leave them some time to spend on a bed together.”

I blushed, “Um, no, I’m returning to my room too.”

“Ohhh?” He raised a brow, his eyes gleaming as if he just found some precious treasure, “Bedroom problem?”

“You shut the hell up,” I snapped, the same time Viserys said, “I promised to wait for her to recover.”

“Recover? It has been a whole year; she isn’t going to remember if she hasn’t yet. My advice, she might remember more if you do her tonight—”

“Enough!” Viserys barked, his expression darker than I had ever seen, “You’ve crossed a line, Daemon. We’ll not talk of this again.”

“Hmph. I can find you a nice girl in the street of—”

“Daemon!”

“Fine. We’ll talk more tomorrow, have a sweet dream, a beautiful princess.” With that last line on Rhaenyra, he left us, leaving me angry and embarrassed.

“That’s not a very nice thing to say to your face, but I think he means well...”

“Rhaenyra, don’t you stick up for him. Also, make sure Cole or some other people are always with you if you’re spending time with him.” I would prefer it if she didn’t spend time with him at all, but there’s a limit to what I could do.

She rolled her eyes, “He’s my uncle. You’re saying like he wants to murder me.”

“He’s known to have japed at your brother’s death and left King’s Landing in anger when you’re declared heir.” Also, he wanted to bed you rather than kill you because he’s a power-hungry asshole.

“I don’t believe Daemon will harm Rhaenyra,” Viserys said tiredly, “But it isn’t bad to ensure a kingsguard is always on your side.”

“Criston already does,” She glanced at the doorway, where the knight in question was standing.

“Good. Now, good night, Rhaenyra.”

“Good night, father. Good night, Alicent.”

I was supposed to leave right after her, but Viserys pulled me aside and stopped me. “Do you not remember Daemon?”

“Remember... what?” Was I too obvious in my hatred of him? But that could be explained easily enough. “I remember that he’s your brother, and father had told me many times about his deeds and character.”

He forced out a smile, “I presume it wouldn’t be flattering.”

“Yeah, I’m sure you can imagine it.” I expected he’d let me go then, but he kept me locked there, staring at my face with an unreadable expression. “...?”

“...What Daemon said... pay no mind to it,” He eventually said, “I’ll not take a mistress.”

“I don’t mind... I mean I don’t care what he said at all!” Oops, almost slipped. I quickly added, “You’re the best, most understanding husband I can think of.”

“Thanks. I know you’ll remember... you’ll remember someday.” He let me go, but the longing and desperation in his words gave me a shiver. Was I keeping him hanging for too long?

Would he one day decide he couldn’t wait anymore?

I felt sorry for him, I did, but I didn’t want to be raped. Facing this challenge, I chose to escape. “I think so too. See you tomorrow!” Gotta run!

He didn’t react to my abrupt exit, only continued to stare at me strangely. I had a bad feeling about this…


	10. Chapter 7: Sympathy For The Devil

It’s a few hours past midnight when I was woken up by someone arguing outside my room.

“Her grace is sleeping...”

“She’ll be happy if she knows it’s me.” No, I wouldn’t, Rhaenyra, shut up.

“You’re doing your job well, but it’s of utmost importance that you let us see the queen now.” Who’s that...

...Oh, damn you Daemon!

“What the heck are you two doing here?” I hissed as soon as I stepped out of the door, “Do you know what time it’s now?”

“The sun will soon rise,” The annoying prince said freshly, “Wakey wakey, we’re off for a trip.”

“...I’ve got a lot of questions,” I looked around and saw Cole standing behind Rhaenyra, his expression as dark as mine, and felt slightly better, “But first: Why invite me of all people to your bloody trip?”

“I realized my crassness yesterday has upset you,” He mocking bowed, “As such, I’d properly apologize with this trip.”

“Uh-huh,” Let’s hope this wasn’t a plan to have me die in a tragic accident, “And this trip requires me to go out at this hour?”

“How else can you watch the sunrise?”

“Please,” Rhaenyra said, a smirk on her lips, “It’ll be great for you.”

...Okay, they’re planning something. I wondered what Daemon had told her.

“Fine,” I sighed, “Where’re we going?”

They exchanged a glance, “Wear your travel clothes and I’ll bring you there.”

“Can’t tell me?”

“It’s a surprise!” Rhaenyra winked.

“...Give me a few minutes.” I retreated into my room, searching. Should I bring a weapon just in case? My kingsguard would follow me but I wasn’t sure how well he would fare against Daemon...

“Wait, calm down,” I told myself. Daemon wouldn’t attack me in front of Rhaenyra, that would be suicidal of him. If he wanted to pretend it to be an accident, then he would have to, say, push me off a cliff or something.

Okay, no need to find a weapon then. I put on the most comfortable pairs of trousers and went out to meet them.

Here goes nothing.

———

“No,” I stood firmly on the ground, my arms crossed, “No, I’m not going in.”

“We haven’t even told you what we’re doing yet,” Rhaenyra said.

“I don’t care what you’re planning,” I pointed at the dragon pit, “But I’m not going inside again. Not in a thousand years.”

“Alicent, dear, have you ever thought about it?” Daemon put a hand on my shoulders and explained, “You lost your memories because of a dragon. If you overcome your fear of dragons, your memories might come back.”

“I have faced Syrax before,” I pushed him away, “Nothing came back. I’ll pass.”

“I’ve heard your story. You’ve faced a dragon... but you haven’t tried riding one.”

“Excuse me? Do I look like I have a drop of dragon blood in me?” If you planned to have me killed trying to tame a dragon, then you couldn’t be more stupid.

“No, but you’re with me. I’ll take you on Caraxes for a sunrise you’ve never seen, then come back here safe and swift.” He smiled smugly, “You have no reason to refuse now.”

“...” I was out of words. I couldn’t judge this was a genuine offer to help me, a badly disguised prank, or an attempt of murder. If he pushed me down his dragon midair, Viserys wouldn’t forgive him even if he claimed it to be an accident...

“Before I answer... who’s idea is this?” If this was Rhaenyra’s idea, then I would be more comfortable to go along with it.

“Rhaenyra mentioned your phobia of dragons, I devised the whole plan,” Daemon said.

“...Thought so,” I sighed. I didn’t have much choice, now did I? If I refused, Daemon and Rhaenyra would be alone. “Okay, I’m in.”

It couldn’t be worse than... I dunno, Bungy jump?

———

“Ahhhhhh!” I screamed, “Help! Papa! Mama! Anyone!”

“Stop shouting into my ears and hold on!” Daemon forcefully grabbed my arms across his waist, “Do you want to die?!”

“How am I supposed to... ahhhh!” A sudden gust of wind almost threw me off the dragon’s back, and I was forced to hold on tight to Daemon as he demanded.

“Better?” He asked after a moment of silence, “If you had done as I said in the first place...”

“Shut up.” This was still no better than Bungy jump. I hated to have any physical contact with him, and it wasn’t comfortable on the dragon’s back even if I no longer felt I would fall anytime.

However, I now had the mental energy to look for Rhaenyra. It’s still dark, so I couldn’t see her face, but I could see her waving at us on the back of Syrax. At least she’s around...

“Alright, we’re here,” Daemon suddenly said, “Look.”

“...?” I didn’t know what he wanted me to see. He turned to glance at me, “Do you not recall what we’re here for? Here,” Seeing my confused look, he guided my head with his hand, and—

“Ohh...” The sun was dawning upon us, the first line of light coloring the sky into yellow. The whole Red Keep and King’s Landing was illuminated, revitalizing the city.

“Breathtaking, wasn’t it?” Daemon whispered, “Only the sunlight would have given its shine equally to the slums and the castle. But it can only be seen at this height.”

“Changing the perspective, huh. I can’t believe you can be so thoughtful.”

“I’m no mindless brute if you could remember that. Anything that comes up?”

“No. But...” It wasn’t the first time I had seen a sunrise. But in the sky of King’s Landing... “Thank you. You can be nice when you want to.”

“I’m nice, you say? The first time someone said that.” He was strangely… cheerful?

“That sounds like a very sad thing to say?” Even I had been called nice before.

“This isn’t what people would usually use to describe me,” He said, his voice wistful, “The world isn’t a nice place. I simply adapt to the working of this world.”

“I thought you’re the kind of guy to say ‘the world is my playground’.”

“Both are true. The world is my playground, just not a nice playground,” He paused to muse, then said, “This was a world where we compete against each other with blood and fire, and I thrive in it. But it isn’t a nice environment.”

“…Does that mean you would rather live in a less… deadly world?” I couldn’t believe Daemon Targaryen of all people was telling me that he disliked Westeros.

“This is the only world that I’ve ever been to, so who knows?” he shrugged.

“Well, I’ve been—” Shit! I almost covered my mouth with my hands, but that would be even more suspicious. Daemon stared at me, and I quickly said, “I… I’ve been thinking, maybe in the future… we wouldn’t need to compete with dragons at all?”

“Then what will people compete with?”

“Umm, I dunno, board games?”

“The one you made?” He laughed, “Sure, that’d be a world I don’t mind being in. I’d beat everyone the same. Including you.”

“...Two seconds and you’re back to being an ass.” This man couldn’t be praised at all.

“I prefer you to say ‘a handsome rogue’, but thanks for the compliment.”

“You’re a narcissistic asshole.” During our bickering, the sun had gone all the way up and the sky had turned blue. We slowly descended to the ground.

After we landed, I found several people waiting for us: the two knights, the Hightowers...

...And Viserys.

“Father?” It’s Rhaenyra who leaped off first. I tried to dismount as quickly as possible, seeing how Otto was glaring at me, but Daemon ignored my wish and grabbed me by my waist as he jumped off. I wanted to dig a hole and hide.

“Ser Criston has informed me of your little adventure.” Viserys said, “I’m glad that you’ve returned safely. Alicent...” Daemon playfully shoved me forward, “Do you remember anything new?”

“No,” I apprehensively approached him, “Nothing at all.”

His gaze wandered to Daemon first before meeting mine. “Did you at least have a good time?”

“...I guess so.”

“If Balerion was still alive,” He said with a bitter laugh, “I could have gone with you. But never mind, let’s go back, you must be hungry.”

“Yeah, I’m starving.” I nodded eagerly.

He took my hand— with a surprising, almost hurting strength— and pulled me along, walking out of the dragon pit. Rhaenyra and Daemon were chatting behind our backs, and I could still feel Otto’s glare burning holes into my skull, but Viserys paid them no mind.

“Umm, are you... angry?” I was quite frankly scared; he had never treated me so roughly before. He was staring straight forward, a smile fixated on his face. I couldn’t read his expression.

“Why would I? You did nothing wrong.” His tone was near acidic, and with his words, his grip tightened.

“It hurts,” I complained, and he immediately let go and stared at me with horror.

“Sorry, I’m just... worried.” He said, his tone softened, “We all heard you screaming...”

“Ahaha, that’s so embarrassing,” I forced out a laugh, “Did I wake you up?”

“The whole city, mayhaps.”

“Oh no!” We shared a laugh, and so closed the issue.

It wasn’t the end of that, however. As soon as Viserys was gone, Otto pulled me aside and hissed, “What are you thinking, going out with him?”

“I don’t want to go either! It’s only because of Rhaenyra. And it ended well, didn’t it?” The breakfast had gone swimmingly and Viserys didn’t seem to be mad anymore.

“It’s my mistake that I haven’t warned you yet, so here: I don’t want that man to get near you. In no circumstances I would see him touch a finger of yours again. Clear?”

“...I know you hate him, and I hold no love for him as well, but ahh... I don’t think you need to worry about me if that’s what you’re afraid of? His target isn’t me.”

Hmm, when I thought about it, there were rumors that Daemon had bedded Alicent before she married Viserys. I suppose this was what Otto was worried about, my reputation.

“You better remember, he’s our greatest enemy.”

“I know. That’s why I need to observe him closely.” If I could insert myself between him and Rhaenyra every time like today, then I’d consider my mission a success.

He let out a long-suffering sigh, “Starting today, I want Myles with you wherever you go. I’ll tell Gwayne to accompany you whenever he’s available too.”

“Poor Myles,” I joked, and he glared at me again, “Fine, fine, I’ve no objection.”

“Take care of ourselves, we cannot always be on your side.”

“Of course, father.” I yawned, “I’ll take a nap first... if you're going to send for Myles, please tell him to meet me no earlier than afternoon.”

“I swear, you’ll be the death of me.” This had slowly become his mantra whenever he couldn’t convince me of something.

He should get used to it, I wasn’t going to change. Now, to have a sweet dream...


	11. Chapter 8: Playing With Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This chapter contains an attempted sexual assault

Throughout the teenage years of my life, I rarely talk to other people unless necessary, and no one would speak to me. As someone who grew up isolated, I had long since given up all notion of romance.

No one would like a girl as clumsy, childish, and dumb as me. I would live my life as I always did, alone.

So, I didn’t know what to do when Viserys liked me... Alicent as he did. He’s caring and sweet, but I couldn’t... I wasn’t the real her. I couldn’t just accept him into my heart when he didn’t know the real me.

...There’s one time when someone asked me to be his girlfriend.

But it was—

———

Not long after that day, Rhaenyra sent me an invite to her tea party. In handwritten notes highlighting “All girls”.

However, when I arrived, I saw someone I didn’t like.

“Hey, since when are you a girl?” I asked as Daemon tilted his head towards me and smirked.

“You see my hair? I’m a girl.” Please. I even told Myles there’s no need to follow me since this was a girl’s party.

“Rhaenyra,” I ignored him and turned towards her, “What’s he doing here?”

“Oh, he’s our special guest,” She smiled brightly, “Last time we did this, didn’t you tell me we can bring special entertainment to liven up the party?”

...I just threw a rock on my foot, didn’t I? “I mean gifts and games,” So we wouldn’t only be eating cakes with nothing to do, “Not... humans.”

“So, I’m a human in your eyes?”

“Umm,” I narrowed my eyes, “What else you could be if you’re not a human?”

“A dra—”

“Dragon is not an acceptable answer.”

“But I’m a dragon.” Stop puffing your cheek, you’re a grown man, not a baby!

Rhaenyra giggled, “You’re funnier than Mushroom.”

“That isn’t exactly a compliment.” “Ohh, I would love to see you wear Mushroom’s hat, being the clown suits you—” “That’s a duel-worthy insult.”

Yeah, we had a “great” time. I still didn’t know why Daemon was here in the end, however.

If he wanted to approach Rhaenyra, surely he wouldn’t want me to be here?

Otto’s warning came back to my mind but I discarded it quickly. Befriending me... befriending Alicent gave Daemon nothing. He was supposed to hate Alicent and her children for pushing him further down the succession.

So what was his plan?

Maybe it’s Rhaenyra’s wish to include me in their meetings and he just did this to please her?

...Yeah, that must be it. That said, it might be safer to let Myles or Gwayne follow me in addition to the kingsguard.

We didn’t know what he would do, after all.

———

Yet he kept showing up in my daily life.

Our good old tradition of the game night (I could beat him about half the times), random encounters in the hall, Rhaenyra’s invitations... hell, he showed up in the nursery once or twice.

Could you imagine if he was nice to Aegon and Aemond?

I had all the gifts he gave them checked for poison (against Aegon’s protest), but nope, they’re perfectly fine.

He’s playing the role of the cool and funny uncle so well that I started to doubt myself.

Did he have any hidden intention at all? Would he come back and be content in playing around every day?

Despite myself, I felt that I was getting more and more comfortable with his existence. I didn’t know what to feel about that.

When in doubt, it’s time to ask for a second opinion.

“Myles, Gwayne,” I asked, “Do you think Daemon is pretending to be nice?”

“He wasn’t a good man,” Gwayne said, “My men love him because he’s as bad as they’re. But he’s capable of charming people as well.”

“You hate working in the City Watch, don’t you?” Myles asked.

A bitter smile appeared on Gwayne’s lips, “You don’t know them as I do. They’re a bunch of rouges representing the worst of the city.”

“I know, sorry brother,” I nodded to Gwayne— I knew he had a tough time in the City Watch, “But I can’t get what he’s doing with me— with us. He’s civil towards you two too, isn’t he?”

“He’s acting very friendly the few times we talked.” Myles nodded.

“He offered me hints to be more popular within my men,” Gwayne spat, “I respectfully refused.”

“Arghh,” I scratched my head, “This is absurd. If he acts like how he’s supposed to, I won’t need to think so much about it!”

“You’re the one to say...” Myles smiled wryly, “If you’re so worried, why don’t you—”

A knock on the door.

“Huh?” I asked, “Who?”

“It’s Prince Daemon,” My kingsguard said.

I looked at Myles and Gwayne, but they provided me with no answer.

“Okay, let him in,” I said warily. It wouldn’t do well to suddenly refuse his entry.

“I heard you screaming,” Daemon walked towards us, “You sounded to be troubled. Why don’t we talk about it?”

“You might notice that we’re having a little Hightower gathering here and I’m telling my brothers about my troubles.”

“Oh, but could they solve it?” He smirked, “No offense to either of you, but it doesn’t look like you have her comforted. Maybe I can have a try?”

“They can’t solve it for me because the trouble in question is you.” I rolled my eyes, “Now, will you explain what exactly you want by coming here?”

“You view me as trouble. How hurtful. Have I ever done anything to you?”

“...I guess not.” I reluctantly admit. “But I don’t get your actions. Why do you keep approaching me?”

Once I said the words, I felt Gwayne and Myles behind me tensing up, and I noticed what I just asked. This was the time of the showdown.

Daemon tilted his head and gave us a lopsided grin. “You want to know?”

He extended a hand, “Then come with me.”

I stared at him, trying to grasp his intention, but nothing came up. “You can’t tell me here?”

“There’s something I want you to do for me. Once it’s done, I’ll tell you everything.”

“Everything...” I should refuse such a dangerous invitation, I knew, but I was lured by his words.

“Alicent!” “Alicent, wait!” My brothers called behind me. I looked back at them and nodded, a chill running down my spine.

“I won’t take too long,” I said, begging them silently to do the smart thing.

It’s just a split second, but Myles nodded shortly, “Well then.”

I trust that he got my message.

———

“I thought you’re bringing me somewhere interesting. Here?” I rolled my eyes, “This is just an empty room!”

After all this walking, even. This did nothing to lessen my suspicion of him.

“This is indeed nothing special. I just need to fend off any listening ears.”

“That doesn’t sound reassuring.” I crossed my arms.

“No need to get so defensive,” He smiled, a warmer, more genuine smile than what he had outside, “I want you to show me your hand.”

I blinked, “Huh?”

“Your invisible arm. Since I came back, you’ve been wearing your gloves... I’m awfully curious about it.”

I blinked again. Then again. “Umm, you know you can ask for that the first day we met... I mean reunite, right?”

“You seem quite hostile to me, so I thought to warm you up.” He said, entirely serious. “What?”

“Hahaha,” I laughed, “hahaha... I can’t believe it...”

I couldn’t believe I had been worrying about it for so long. Just for that dumb reason.

Daemon raised a brow and cracked a grin, and I slowly got over my laughter and removed my gloves. “Here,” I said, still giggling, “Look as much as you want.”

His gaze was attracted to the empty space that contained my right arm. “Can I touch it?”

“...Sure.” Now it’s all clear, I didn’t have a reason to chase him away.

He sat beside me and took my right hand in his. His fingers traced the shape of my palm, all of my fingers, and he stroked my front arm with his whole palm, again and again.

“Hey... are you done?” It wasn’t like the maester’s examinations. Daemon seemed to crave the touch of my arm more than anything, as his hand kept touching mine, refusing to leave its surface.

“You’re adorable, do you know?” Suddenly, he asked.

“Huh? What... huh?” Oh shit. I must be blushing.

What the heck was he saying?

Me? Adorable? Me?

“Are... are you...” Flirting with me?

“Viserys doesn’t get you,” He said, his hands climbing up to my shoulders. “You want someone to tell you that, someone to praise you and proclaim his love for you.”

“Ah...” I couldn’t move, suddenly being aware of his closeness, the warmth of his palms, his smell of bloodshed, and wine.

“I can give you what you want, and nobody else will know,” He pulled me into his arms and whispered seductively, “Do you want it?”

I—

I remembered—

———

I went abroad to study after many painful years of being unable to fit in.

He was another foreign student in the same school, and we spoke no common language apart from English. I was surprised when he approached me, seeking my help. We had never talked before.

He told me he had nowhere to stay, and he needed to wait for his roommate to return before he could. He asked for a place to stay— only a few hours, not the whole night.

Like the idiot I was, I invited him to my own home.

We chatted over broken English, and he told me, “You’re cute.”

I don’t recall what I said, but I do remember him hugging me from behind, telling me, “Be my girlfriend.”

“No.” I refused immediately, sirens blasting in my head.

“Yes.” He said, his hands placed on my abdomen.

“No.” I attempted to stay calm, but I was truly afraid. He’s asking nicely now, but if he decided to use force...

“Yes.” He continued to say. I had only started talking to you today, I didn’t want this!

“No, no, no.” Please don’t, please—

“Really no?”

“Really no.” My voice almost broke.

“Okay.” He let me go. “We’re still friends, yes?”

“...Yes.” I hoped I wouldn’t ever see him again.

And I never did. I had seen him in the school a few times, but I avoided him, and he never sought me out again.

———

“No,” I said, “Definitely not.”

“No? You mean yes,” His mouth was dangerously close to my face and I could feel his hot breath. But I wouldn’t be afraid. I had done this before.

“No means no. I’m not playing hard-to-get. I don’t want you, Daemon.” I needed to stand firm. Stand firm, and he would leave me alone.

He stared at me intensively, “You know I’m right. You love it when I praise you. You went all red when I said you’re adorable.”

“...That’s true,” No doubt, my heart raced when Daemon flirted with me, as it did when  _ he _ did the same thing. But my brain won out and overran any feeling I could have. “If it isn’t you, it might be different.”

I wouldn’t fall for your trap and ruin everything I had built up.

This was the wrong thing to say, as his eyes were filled with rage upon hearing my words.

“Wait, I only mean that you aren’t—”

He covered my mouth with his hands and climbed over me.


	12. Intermission 3: Null And Nothing

**The Rogue Prince**

“Thank you. You can be nice when you want to.” Alicent said, her mouth inches behind his face, white air coming from her every breath in the cold morning air.

“I’m nice, you say?” How adorable, “The first time someone said that.”

How decidedly unlike Alicent Hightower at all.

Alicent, when she’s a young girl, loved how dangerous he was. Daemon had taken advantage of that, just to place an attack on Otto, but he had left to find his own fortune soon.

Had he known it’d lead to Viserys taking her as his second wife...

“That sounds like a very sad thing to say?” But ohh, this new her was completely different.

How exciting, “This isn’t what people would usually use to describe me.” To have her forgetting everything, to have her think he’s nice, “The world isn’t a nice place. I simply adapt to the working of this world.”

It almost made him consider making a detour.

“I thought you’re the kind of guy to say ‘the world is my playground’.” She said, a smile in her voice.

This was fitting. The world was his playground, and he would have it all.

Daemon knew he was different from a young age. His first memory was when his mother died...

He was a child, attending her funeral. He saw her lifeless body being put on a pyre and lit on fire. His father, Viserys, everyone was devastated.

Daemon... felt almost nothing. The adults thought he’s too young to understand the meaning of death, but this wasn’t the core of the issue.

He perfectly understood: his mother wasn’t coming back. She wouldn’t be able to hug him, to talk to him. But he wasn’t more than irritated by the thought of his mother’s passing.

At first, he was confused. As he grew up, he tried to find out the difference between him and others. What made people cry? What made people sad?

At last, he arrived at one conclusion.

He lacked... humanity. His heart was empty, with nothing in it.

Nothing. That was who he was. His essence.

He didn’t feel the same thing most people did. Happiness, sadness, fear... he didn’t have that.

He knew how to crack a laugh, but he knew not how to cry. When people shed tears, he only felt irritation or rage.

Only when he picked up his sword and tame his dragon, he found immersive, overwhelming joy.

He enjoyed wielding his sword and on top of his dragon. That’s where he belonged— holding the weapon to take one’s life and on the top of everyone else.

For others, like his brother, it was a challenge and bother to navigate in this deadly world. Yet for Daemon, he thrived and soared in it.

This was a world where the most shameless, the vilest survive to write their tale. And he had all the qualities to win all the matches.

He’d get the most out of it.

“…Does that mean you would rather live in a less… deadly world?”

A world that offered no bloodlust and slaughter?

The mere thought of it should bore him, but he read another possibility from her question.

A world that... he could feel what people feel... where he could finally understand.

“This is the only world that I’ve ever been to, so who knows?” He couldn’t say he wasn’t intrigued.

To have a life where people would call him nice... to experience what he couldn’t have.

He had planned to take the crown with wits and charm, but it wouldn’t hurt to try what he hadn’t done in a long time.

To be... a nice person.

———

But it couldn’t be.

Try as he might, he felt nothing.

Nothing, when they joked and played around. Nothing, when he once again beat everyone in her game. Nothing, when he spent his time charming Rhaenyra with his story.

No human could make him feel anything other than annoyance, anger, or... lust.

He should be angry at Alicent for wasting his time, tricking him in this folly. But when she’s around, he had only found her... lovable.

Hilariously foolish and naive. Easily manipulated. Slightly mad, and certainly not suited to be a queen or even a mother. Completely out-of-bonds.

This new Alicent was his type of woman, unlike the old her.

Taking Rhaenyra wouldn’t be easy. He would need time to worm into her heart, to corrupt her, to make her yield herself to him.

So, in the meantime... Why not play for a bit?

“Arghh,” He heard her scream through the door. He could imagine her scratching head entirely unladylike.

He swiftly inserted himself into her conversation with her brothers.

“...Why do you keep approaching me?” She asked.

He smiled. She’s still suspicious of him, it’s clear. As were the Hightower brothers.

They weren’t wrong with their suspicion.

“You want to know?” He held out a hand, “Then come with me.”

She stared at him, her wide eyes full of confusion. “You can’t tell me here?”

“There’s something I want you to do for me.” One thing he’s curious about, “Once it’s done, I’ll tell you everything.” Everything he planned to tell.

He led her in circles to keep her brothers from following them. Eventually, he told her his wish. She laughed heartily, before agreeing and took off her gloves.

There’s nothing under it, as she had claimed. “Can I touch it?”

“...Sure.” She looked at him, those innocent eyes.

It made him want to take her right here and now.

He took her hand, soft and warm and slightly sweaty, although it looked like a pile of air. But it’s there.

He didn’t have any interest in taking it up with the old Alicent. But the current Alicent...

The difference was invisible but plainly existed.

It’s the invisible part that attracted him.

“You’re adorable, do you know?” He asked. He’s tired of pretending, and he wanted her.

“Huh? What... huh?” She went agape. Blinking rapidly, her face flushed red. “Are... are you...”

Aww, even that stammering was so in character.

“Viserys doesn’t get you. You want someone to tell you that, someone to praise you and proclaim his love for you.” He was confident of that, from his observation.

“Ah...” She was too stunned to say anything. He pulled her close, “I can give you what you want, and nobody else will know. Do you want it?”

He’s so sure of himself.

“No, definitely not.” Came the answer.

“You mean yes,” He wasn’t discouraged yet. All women caved in eventually.

“No means no. I’m not playing hard-to-get. I don’t want you, Daemon.” However, this made him pause.

“You know I’m right. You love it when I praise you. You went all red when I said you’re adorable.” He saw it. He couldn’t be wrong. She couldn’t escape him—

And she broke him.

“If it isn’t you, it might be different.”

_ Isn’t him? _

She had a specific problem with him?

She’s exactly what he had observed. But she would deny Daemon, and Daemon only.

And Daemon Targaryen was not to be denied.

She’s still talking, so he shut her up with his hands. “Mm!” She struggled under him, refused to let him take what he wanted.

He hissed, “You won’t get away with tricking and stringing me along. Stop resisting now, and I’ll be merciful— argh!”

A finger— an invisible finger— stabbed into his left eye. He grabbed her arm at once but was too late. She screamed, “Help! Myles! Gwayne! He—”

He moved to silence her, but it was the moment the door burst opened.

“Alicent!” The older brother tried to approach her but stopped at the sight of darksister.

The younger one had his sword out, pointing towards him. Despite eying the Valyrian steel sword carefully, he didn’t seem to hesitate. “What’ve you done to my sister!?”

Did Hightower really think he could win against him? Even losing one eye, he was still the better swordsman. A grin appeared on Daemon’s face. “Nothing she doesn’t want and doesn’t deserve.”

“He tried to rape me!” Alicent whimpered, rubbing her head where he had hit her.

“Why would I try to rape the queen, my brother’s wife?” His voice was cold despite the hot blood dripping from his left eye. He wouldn't be able to leave King’s Landing if Viserys believed her words. This was a game of trust, and he would trust him more than her.

All he would need to do was stay put, spread the rumors, and ruin her reputation— which was already in the dust. She had plenty of reasons for wanting to frame him and take revenge on him from their past.

Then when the time came, she would pay with more than an eye and her body.

Her brothers, unsurprisingly, didn’t trust him. “You dare tell me my sister is a liar in my face, rapist?!” Gwayne Hightower could no longer restrain himself and attacked him.

“Fool.” Daemon didn’t think he could pose any threat. He wasn’t wrong... but he wasn’t expecting her.

“Criston, help Ser Gwayne!” Rhaenyra ordered, and with her words, a worthwhile opponent jumped in.

Cole wanted to fight Daemon ever since he came back to King’s Landing. Sadly for him, Daemon wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.

“Rhaenyra,” Daemon called, his voice hurt, “Don’t you trust me?”

“Alicent, she won’t...” She gasped as she saw his eye, “...Lie...” She was shaken, he could feel it.

It wouldn’t go well if he lost Rhaenyra’s trust. He sighed and dropped darksister, “I’ll prove my innocence in front of your father.”

“Viserys won’t believe you,” Alicent seethed, “He won’t, I’m... I’m...” Yet even she sounded less and less sure as she struggled to continue.

You’d lose, bitch, Daemon thought, and you’d pay for this very soon.


	13. Intermission 4: Could Have Been The Best Life

**The King On The Iron Throne**

When Alicent came to court at first, Viserys didn’t think much of her.

Sure, she was pretty and capable, but he was a married man with a perfectly fine wife and a daughter. He respected and admired Aemma for who she was and never thought of another.

Until she died. And soon their son followed. Daemon didn’t share his grief; he always had trouble in caring for others, but his jape was a step too far.

It wasn’t a logical decision, but he decided that he would deny Daemon his satisfaction by proclaiming Rhaenyra his heir. The next day, Daemon left his court.

As usual, he ran away from what he didn’t like and did not attempt to change himself. But at that point, Viserys didn’t care. All he had was his grief and burning rage.

Then after a few days, he found Alicent crying in an empty room, huddling her knees.

“My lady?” He asked, wondering if he should interrupt. Alicent wasn’t close to Aemma, and there’s nothing wrong with Otto and the rest of the Hightowers, so he didn’t know the cause of her sorrow.

“Your grace,” She lifted her head and he saw that her face was riddled with tears, “My apologies. I must have disturbed you.”

“No, please don’t apologize. What has happened?”

“It’s... Daemon,” She sniffed, “He left me... he promised...”

“Daemon,” His jaw clenched; with Daemon’s reputation as a womanizer, it wasn’t hard to guess the rest of it. “Had he... dishonored you?”

A short, hesitated nod. “And he had... he had...” She couldn’t seem to continue her sentence, but with where she was placing her hands...

“...He had gotten you with a child?” From her expression, he knew he was right.

“When father knows, he’ll send me back to Oldtown and banish me to the Starry Sept,” She urgently whispered, “He already suspected me.”

“Otto doesn’t need to know anything,” He tried to comfort her, “Have you drunk moontea?”

“...Not yet,” She lowered her head, “I was afraid that father would know through the Grand Maester...”

“It won’t be a problem if I’m the one who asks him.”

“You?” She widened her eyes, “But your grace, if you do so, sooner or later there’ll be rumors that it was you who...”

“Let there be rumors,” He found himself saying, “I’m his elder brother, I should take responsibility for his wrongdoings.”

At that point, it might have been pity and a sense of responsibility.

But when she first stared at him with disbelief, then bloomed into a tearful, grateful smile...

“I couldn’t ever repay you, your grace,” She said, her voice still hoarse from crying, but every bit full of joy.

He found himself hard to take his eyes away.

He hadn’t, wouldn’t consider anyone else when his advisors urged him to remarry. He wanted the girl with that smile. He wanted to protect and cherish her.

He wasn’t expecting children from her because of her abortion, but she had defied his expectations once again. She gave him not one, but three children, one after another.

However, she desired more. Otto desired more. They would have him to change his decree, to go back on his words.

If he hadn’t done that to spite Daemon, he would have gladly let Aegon succeed him. But he couldn’t do that now; he couldn’t betray Rhaenyra’s expectation.

Just when he thought he couldn’t mend the rift between his wife and his daughter—

She... changed.

———

“...Can’t believe you chose her of all people,” Daemon laughed, “I assume you know I was with her before? You always have a thing for... wreck women, after all.”

“I do,” Viserys drank deeply, ignoring his comment, “That’s why I asked you to come to see me.”

“You want to know if she remembers. She doesn’t, fear not. She would never come with me if she knew our past together.”

Would Daemon lie to him? He absolutely would, Viserys thought, but only if he had something to gain from it. Which meant... “You wouldn’t provoke her?”

“Hmm,” Daemon thoughtfully stroked the bottom of his goblet, “She’s way more interesting this way. I won’t move against her.”

That’s good, but it wasn’t the promise he was looking for. “Swear that you won’t touch her.”

“You’re serious? She’s your wife. Have I ever touched Aemma when she’s alive?”

“I don’t want to hear Aemma’s name from your mouth,” Viserys squeezed his goblet tight, “And don’t change the topic with questions. Promise me.”

“Fine, I promise,” He smirked, “Will you touch her, however?”

Viserys ground his teeth. Daemon knew best how to get under his skin. “She... doesn’t want it.” He knew that very well, every time he faced her, wanting to embrace her, he could feel her freezing up.

The current Alicent reminded him of Aemma whenever he touched her. That was the look of a child who wasn’t ready to be wed or bed. He had no choice with Aemma, but he didn’t want to force Alicent until her mind returned to a more mature state.

“You’re being too passive. If you would just take her—”

“I do not need your advice, Daemon.”

“Hmph,” Daemon’s gaze sharpened, “You want me to stay away from her yet make no attempt yourself. You call me immature and willful, but you’re running from the reality here. She won’t ever remember, brother, face the truth.”

“Even if she never recovers completely, she’ll grow to accept me in her heart.” That’s what supported Viserys nowadays. Didn’t Aemma stop being afraid of him a while after their first child was conceived? Alicent would, certainly, do so too. With time.

“That’s what you tell yourself to keep you sane?” Daemon crackled, “If that’s your wish, I won’t destroy your fantasy. But do remember that I’ve warned you.”

She would love me, Viserys told himself, and we could have the best life together.

Soon.

———

“...She tried to seduce me, and when I refused, she stabbed me in the eye,” Daemon said, his left eye covered in bandages. It’d recover even if not completely, Runciter had told him.

Viserys couldn’t care less about Daemon’s eye now. “You promised me to keep your hands from her!”

“I did, I refused her advances. Hence, she almost poked my eye off... she’s most likely mad. You better annul—”

“This is the complete opposite of what happened! He tried to force himself on me.” Alicent shouted.

“He laid a hand on his queen. He should be executed by all laws of Gods and men.” Otto said, glowering at his biggest rival.

“Ser Otto, you’re not a part of the small council and this trial, please remain silent.” Lyonel, Viserys’ Hand, was holding the trial, “We’ve heard both sides of the argument. Ser Myles, Ser Gwayne, please describe the situation you had found the queen.”

Viserys was glad that someone could perform this role for him, otherwise, he’d cut off Daemon’s head here and now. But he couldn’t do that.

“Prince Daemon had taken our sister from us with a flimsy excuse,” Myles Hightower said, his normally calm expression overridden with anger, “We didn’t trust him, so we decided to follow them. However, we lost them on the way.”

“That’s when we met the Princess and Ser Criston,” Gwayne said with a nod to Rhaenyra, “Princess Rhaenyra informed us where she had last seen them. After we went for the direction she pointed, we heard Alicent screaming for help.”

“We broke down the door, and found him hitting my sister,” Myles concluded.

“So, none of you saw that I tried to rape her as she claimed.” Daemon snorted.

“No, but you’re holding her arm and attacking her, what else could—”

“Ser, that’s enough. I see how it is.” Lyonel was busily writing notes and looking at a piece of paper he had in his hands, “Next, could we have Princess Rhaenyra say her words?”

Rhaenyra stood up, her gaze wavering, “It’s just as Ser Myles and Ser Gwayne said. I had seen Uncle Daemon and Alicent walking past me, then later when Ser Gwayne said he’s trying to find them I told him... I was curious about what they’re doing, so I decided to follow them too.”

“I heard Alicent claiming that Uncle Daemon tried to rape her, and he had darksister out against Ser Gwayne. I was afraid of Alicent and Ser Gwayne’s safety, so I requested Criston, my loyal and able knight, to aid him.”

“In other words, none of you have witnessed the happenings in that room,” Lyonel frowned, still glaring at the paper he had in hand, “Thank you, princess. Next, the Grand Maester.”

Runciter came up, “My apprentice and I had checked the Queen and Prince Daemon’s wound,” He looked at Alicent, “We couldn’t find any evidence that the Prince had attempted to rape her. Instead, given the severity of the Prince’s wound, it’s more likely that she attacked him suddenly and unprovoked...”

“What? This is bullshit! He pushed me to the ground, climbed on me, and tried to silence me...” Alicent cried out, “Why are you helping him?”

Up until now, Daemon was calm and almost cold in his attitude. Now he laughed, “It seems the evidence isn’t on your side, Alicent Hightower. Is it not enough that you had my brother? Your pride couldn’t bear being rejected, and so you had to attack me, had to try to frame me... now the truth is out and you’re on the chopping block. Nobody can save you now.”

Alicent shivered, tears running down her cheeks, “This isn’t... everything he said was a lie...” She looked at Viserys directly and begged, “Please... you won’t believe him over me... I don’t even like him! I... I...” She sniffed, “Please... trust me.”

“Your grace, Runciter has fallen to old age and unsuited to the position of Grand Maester. We should discard his judgment and had Maester—”

“Ser Otto, what did I say about this trial?!” Lyonel barked. He glanced at his letter, then to Viserys, “Your Grace, I think—”

Viserys wasn’t listening to him. His eyes were on Alicent.

Since she lost her memories, she wasn’t acting like herself. If she had lied about her memories initially, could she lie about her feelings for Daemon?

If she had acted like her old self, who hated Daemon more than anything, he wouldn’t have... no, actually he would.

He was always afraid. Afraid that he was Daemon’s second best. Afraid that despite all her harsh words, Daemon weighted more heavily in her heart than he would ever be.

In the end, the trial, Daemon’s words, none of them mattered.

All that mattered was whether he trusted her or not. Whether he trusted himself or not.

He peered into her eyes, gleaming with tears. She’s who he wanted to spend the rest of life with...

The past year, she had changed from a strong, capable woman to a disheveled girl who left food stains on her clothes. Yet that only made him want to cherish her more.

Had she not smiled warmly to him, every time they talked? Had she not befriended Rhaenyra, as he always wished they could?

He couldn’t let Daemon play into his insecurity, he decided. No matter what had been between them, he wouldn’t lose her.

He would... trust her.

“The trial is inconclusive,” He announced, “However, we cannot allow Prince Daemon to run around if Queen Alicent’s claim is true. Therefore, Daemon Targaryen would be put in confinement until further judgment could be made.”

An uproar. Daemon yelled, “Inconclusive? You’d have her ruin you further, brother? She’s a wreck, I told you so! She would continue to deny you and find another, giving you horns—”

“Take him away!” Viserys ordered, and although Daemon was an extraordinary warrior, he was soon restrained without his sword.

Viserys ignored his curses and walked towards Alicent. “This is finished, my love. Let us return.”

“You called me— I...” A smile arose from her tears-ridden face, “Thank you,” Even though she tried to hide it, he could see her blushing, “Thank you.”

That’s what he wanted all along, he recalled, to see her smile. This was what made him fall in love with her in the first place, and he would have fallen in love again just now when he saw her.

Against all noise of uproar from the crowd, all looking eyes, he embraced her firmly. “I won’t doubt you again,” He promised, more to himself than all.

She stiffened, then relaxed immediately, “Thank you...” She continued to whisper, again and again.

He hoped so much that time could stop at that moment.

———

Just the next day, he received the news.

Daemon had escaped from King’s Landing, darksister, and Caraxes with him.

“...Huh?”


	14. Chapter 9: Lie Or Lament

Even after we had returned, Viserys refused to release my hand.

Otto had been urging him to execute Daemon, and Rhaenyra had come to express her joy of seeing my innocence proved (although technically it wasn’t proven), but nothing was as comforting as his embrace.

He... he called me ‘my love’.

I felt my cheeks heating up again just thinking about it.

He had only called me ‘Alicent’ before, didn’t he?

It’s stupid, stupid, stupid. He’s talking about the original Alicent, not me. I knew that, but at the same time, I recalled what Daemon had said.

_“You want someone to tell you that, someone to praise you and proclaim his love for you.”_

He... wasn’t wrong. Now that the right person had told me that...

No, I shook my head, I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t—

“Alicent?” Viserys looked at me worriedly, “Why did you suddenly shake your head?”

“Ahh, nothing, just...” I didn’t know what excuse to give him and just smiled in the end.

He too smiled, “You must be exhausted. Do you want to return to your chambers?”

“Yeah...” He’s looking at me with so much love in his eyes that I couldn’t bear to face him. We walked, hand in hand, like a pair of true lovers.

When we had arrived, he gallantly kissed my hand, “Good night, Alicent.”

Then he released me. He was going to leave, but I called behind him, “Viserys!”

He turned, a gentle smile on his face, “Yes, my love?”

He’s making me blush again. “What’s with you today... you usually aren’t so... sweet.”

“With... Daemon,” There’s hidden resentment when it came to his name, “I realized that I wasn’t providing you with enough safety. I should tell you more about what I feel.”

I lowered my head, “Viserys, I... I’m glad that you trust me. But I don’t... I don’t love you yet.” At least, I didn’t believe what I had for him was... that. Not yet.

He stared at me— then forced out a smile, “I should know that,” His tone was stiff.

“But!” I quickly added, “I’ll try my best... to remember, or to... love you.” This was the best I could do.

If I could never return home... then one day I would have to accept being his wife. And he... was someone I could love.

I never thought I would say that. A lifetime ago, I despised him for causing the Dance...

And now he’s here, looking at me with those moisty eyes. “I, too, will do my best to make you love me.” He said softly.

“Thank you...”

Then, almost naturally, he pulled me close and kissed me again, this time on my lips.

It’s a short, chaste kiss, and he released me right after. “See you tomorrow,” He said and left.

“See... ya...”

Once he was far gone, I started mumbling, “Ehh, aha...”

This was my first proper kiss...

“Ehhahhhha!” I screamed and hid my head in the pillow.

What’s with me now... this was so stupid, so dumb...

Hitting my bed, I couldn’t stop mumbling.

Thanks to this, I didn’t fall asleep until midnight.

———

“What?!” I cried out, “Daemon escaped?!”

“It seems that Grand Maester had released him from his confinement, believing him to be innocent,” Viserys told me, clearly suppressing a headache, “He claimed to have damning evidence against you but refused to tell unless we meet him together.”

“There’s no ‘damning evidence’ because all I have said is true,” I sighed, “But fine, let’s hear what he has to say.”

The old man was in chains as he was dragged in front of us, surprisingly calm despite facing certain death.

“We’re both here now, speak maester,” Viserys demanded.

“Alone,” The maester said, his eyes surveying the rest of the room, “This is a great secret, your grace. A great scandal.”

Viserys hesitated, but eventually said, “Fine. Guards, leave us.”

Once the room was clear, the maester whispered, “Your Grace, the woman sitting beside you isn’t the Queen. She’s a witch sent to destroy you.”

...I didn’t like where this was going.

“You’re mad,” Viserys said, his hand gripping on the pommel of blackfyre.

“She’s only maintaining her look with glamour! Since I discovered her secret, I’ve been watching her closely... she’s attempting to pit you against Prince Daemon!”

“Enough!” Viserys shouted.

The old maester ignored him and continued, “Check her right hand! It shows the hole of her glamour. Her pinky is crooked—”

His sentence was cut off after a flash, his head fell on the ground, blood rushing out his neck.

“You... you don’t have to... kill him...” I stuttered, feeling ill. The dead man’s eyes seemed to follow me as his head rolled on the ground.

My pinky... I was indeed born with crooked pinkies on both hands, but as Alicent, I had seen my new hands; all fingers were straight. If he knew how I was originally, then—

Viserys caught my right hand in his, “This is nonsense, he has gone mad, your finger is—” He paused as he touched my pinky; it looked straight under the gloves, “Your finger...”

Oh, so that’s why the old man had been so interested in examining my hands... and why I always felt comfortable with my body despite being self-inserted.

My body was my original one, it’s just my appearance that looks like Alicent Hightower. That day when I found myself on the Targaryen’s breakfast table... she was replaced by me completely, both body and soul.

“Ehh... I...” I never knew... and this secret had to come out right now, at the worst moment...

As if electrocuted, Viserys released my hand suddenly and stared at me desperately, “This isn’t true... tell me this is all a lie,” He all but begged, “This is something he... Daemon and he had made up...”

“...” Unconsciously, I touched my pinky too. How come I never noticed it before? It’s the same arc I had always known.

“Look at me!” He grabbed my chin and forced me to face him, “Tell me! Are you lying all along? You can’t be, you... you’re Alicent, no matter how I look at it!”

“No, I... eh...” That wasn’t a question I could easily answer. Continue to lie... or to tell him the truth?

With my stammering and sniffing, his expression changed: from desperation to rage, then to sorrow. “You don’t know anything about this, do you?” He whispered, “He must have done something to you... to erase your memories and affect your body. Right?”

I should have nodded, should have agreed with his delusions. Instead, I stood there, only staring at him with frightened eyes.

“Just say it, tell me you know nothing,” He urged, “I’ll find Daemon out and get rid of him. No one will know about this and we can live happily together, with Rhaenyra and our children—”

I couldn’t... lie to him forever.

“I’m not born as Alicent Hightower,” I blurted out, “I remember another life in another world.”

“Huh? What... are you saying...” He stared at me, his face twitching.

I should have lied, but now that I had said it, I couldn’t hide anymore. I couldn’t... I couldn’t continue to lie to him. “I spent twenty-two years living on... living on earth before I came here. That day Syrax ate my arm, I found myself in—”

He grabbed my shoulders and shouted into my ears, “Stop! You’re... you’re Alicent... you aren’t some... imposter...”

“I...” I wanted to tell him I was whom he loved, to accept this lie, and go back to normal. I didn’t want to hurt him more than I already did, but... “I...”

_“Believe in yourself! And as long as you can, don’t stop believing!”_

I needed to... be myself.

“I’m not Alicent. I’m not the woman you married.” I said clearly, “I’m sorry.”

This was my end. No doubt, I would soon be executed, one way or another. Otto and Viserys would do their best to find the real Alicent. I just wished Rhaenyra and my... Alicent’s children would continue to get along well...

I looked at Viserys, waiting for him to deliver judgment. Killing me, or putting me into the black cells...

Yet he only stepped back, trembling, his eyes locked at mine. “He must have done something to you.” He said with certainty.

“No...?” He... he needed to face the truth... “At least, I think he’s innocent...”

“He lied during the trial. He must be working with Daemon.” He said, his face flushed red, pacing animatedly, “Yes, it’s Daemon! Runciter poisoned you under his order, then he came back here to take advantage of you! It all makes sense now!”

How much was he deluding himself, and how much did he truly believe? “I...” It’s harsh, it’s cruel, but seeing him like this hurt more than him ordering my execution, “I’m not your wife. You... you’ve seen my pinky. I’m sure other parts of my body won’t match my look if you touch it... face the truth, please.”

But he wouldn’t hear me, “I won’t believe it. Last night, I saw... no, even now, I can see that you love me. It’s all written in your eyes... and that’s because you’re Alicent.”

He thought that... I loved him?

...Maybe I did, after all. Maybe this was how it’s.

But that only meant that I had to open his eyes.

“I wish I can lie to you and tell you I’m her. But you deserve to know the truth.” I shoved my right hand in front of him, “Go on, touch it. My hand... not just my pinky is crooked, my middle finger is also shorter than normal because it lacks the middle part.” I knew the defects of my body by heart.

He eyed my hand but refused to pick it up, “No,” His voice broke, “You’re... you’re sick. I’ll have to put you to rest until you recover,” He pushed me away and called, “Guards!”

“Huh? No, wait! Viserys, listen to me!” I cried, but he ignored me no matter how I begged him. Soon, I was taken back into my room, the door locked behind me.

I stared at the door. What would Viserys do?

He... he wouldn’t let me to not be Alicent, I could see that now. He wouldn’t accept that he had spent a whole year loving the wrong woman and abandoning his wife.

He wouldn’t let anyone ruin his fantasy. He would keep me here until I told him what he wanted to hear...

“Ahaha...” I started to shiver. I hadn’t realized he had such potential before... it’s kind of ironic, wasn’t it?

I used to write about women being imprisoned in my stories, and now I was one of them.

To think that I was so happy to see Daemon dragged off after the trial, and just one day later it’s my turn. I was such an idiot.

“...” Otto would soon demand to see me, and he would only be the first out of many. How did Viserys plan to deal with that? I had no idea.

...Should I tell him he’s right when he comes back later?

“If I fall back so easily, what’s the point of telling him the truth in the place...” I murmured to myself.

Besides, I swore that I’d be myself.

I needed to stay determined.

———

However, he wasn’t alone when he came back.

“Lord Strong? And you’re...” Coming in with Viserys were his Hand and a woman I had never seen before. She’s around my age, with long black hair and an amused expression on her face.

Viserys stared at me, his face paled like a ghost. “Lyonel brought his daughter to me... she has some interesting insights.”

“Lyonel’s... daughter...” I should have seen all of his children at court before even if I couldn’t recall their names, but she, I didn’t recognize. But that would mean... she’s—

“Yes, it’s just as you thought. I’m Alys Rivers,” She said, her voice as smooth as silk, “I’ve been longing to meet you... Amy Chow.”

She knew my real name.

“I know everything about you, Interloper.” She smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: No, that’s not the author’s real name.


	15. Chapter 10: Nucleus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks for FieryMatter for editing this chapter! And hopefully the remaining ones.

‘Interloper’.

And she said my name.

I finally understood why Viserys looked so pale. He must have thought he could hide my secret... but Lyonel Strong came to him with Alys Rivers, presenting my true identity.

He’s still staring at me now, silently begging me to deny her charges, but I wouldn’t do that.

“...Why? Why do you come to me now? What do you want?” I asked instead. She was an unknown entity, but…

A dreamy smile crept across her face, “All my life, I’ve only wanted one thing,” she intoned. “My dragon prince, the father of my child.”

Aemond.

“You’re not getting my son!” For God’s sake, he’s still a baby!

She tilted her head. “Your son? Is he yours?”

“…No.” That word I spat with clenched teeth.

“What is this about?” Viserys finally interrupted. Better late than never, I guess, but things had already gone very, very wrong. “You’re not getting any of my sons, woman. Do you hear it? None!”

“That won’t be necessary, Your Grace. He’ll come to me when the time comes, and we shall receive your blessings.” Even under the deathly glare of both her father and Viserys, she didn’t seem to be fazed at all. “As for why I’m here… Amy, I’m here to help you.”

“Help?” Even if she knew who I was, would it even help my case with Viserys? “How?”

Her smile faded. “You need to know the whole truth. I can see what other people can’t, the past and the future alike, for as much as I could remember. But the annals of history were absolute. Everything had already been written and set in stone. Neither I, nor anyone, could change history, until…”

Her icy cold finger was mere inches from my collarbone. “Until you came into our world. Your mere existence rewrote everything. A new path now lies in front of us, brighter than ever. Harrenhal will no longer be the end of me... nor yours, father.”

Lyonel Strong’s eyes widened. “I won’t die in a fire?”

“No. You’ll die peacefully in your sleep,” she replied with a wicked grin.

“Enough with this!” Viserys roared, having finally reached his last straw. “Alys Rivers, you told me you know the truth of my wife. Is there any proof of what you’re saying?”

“Proof? I need no proof. The truth is in your heart. Your eyes, they lied. The truth is invisible unless you learn to see it—” Her gaze now met mine. “You’ve been avoiding it for too long. Face it— you were a protester.”

Oh, that’s right.

I remember now—

———

_July 1st, 2020._

_I was but one protester out of many, joining the march in the streets every weekend in the summer, trying to make the government at least listen to our grievances. But no matter how many people were protesting, the only response we got was more and more brutality._

_We did everything we could, but all we got were more and more arrests, more and more disappearances. Even my parents, who were originally supportive, warned me not to go out that day._

_But I had to. This was the first time in my life... that I felt I could be useful to the world. I believed I was working for a great cause. My parents finally relented, as long as I promised to return home before dinner time._

_That was a promise which I would never fulfill._

_I traveled by metro to the streets I was so familiar with. By the time I got there, everything had gone wrong._

_The police were everywhere, with barricades dotting the streets and forcing us to split and find another route. And with this whack-a-mole they were playing with us, I soon found every escape route was closed off._

_Still, I could have come out of this safely. Even when they had found me..._

_“Here’s one! Get her!” A policeman pointed at me as he shouted at his partner._

_I should have run, or surrender and let them take me back to the police station. I might be tortured there, but I would still have a chance to survive._

_Instead, I foolishly thought since there were only two of them, I would have a chance._

_When the police closed in on me, I growled and attacked him..._

_And he had a gun._

_“…Argh…” I was shot, point-blank, on my stomach. The pain overwhelmed me, and I fell on the ground instantly._

_“Shit…” I heard my murderer curse, “It’ll be on the headlines again if this gets out.”_

_“Now you’ve done it,” His partner sighed. “What do we do with this one?”_

_“Ahh… It’ll be more trouble than it’s worth if we bring it back. Throw it into the sea.” He suggested with not even a hint of remorse in his voice._

_“Won’t that be suspicious? Last time…”_

_There were a lot of corpses found in the sea during the last six months, I faintly remembered._

_“You still have the nerve to mention last time? Go get more rocks so that the corpse doesn’t float back up.”_

_“Okay…” The partner sighed as he picked up my body._

_The harbor wasn’t far from where I was. Soon, I was unceremoniously dumped into a rubbish bag, with a lot of rocks..._

_Sinking, sinking, sinking… into darkness. To turn into fish feed, or into another unidentifiable corpse months later for my grieving parents to collect if I were lucky…_

_Papa, mama, I’m sorry._

_I can’t come back home again._

_I didn’t even become someone you can be proud of. Dying a hero’s death. Protecting someone._

_Worthless. Meaningless._

_If I could have another chance to do things right…_

———

“I...” Tears were dripping down my chin when I finally came back to reality, or whatever ‘reality’ counted for these days anyway. “I... died, didn’t I…”

Was my life in Westeros all just a dream of mine, during the last moments of my life?

“What are you saying? You’re alive! You’re here...” Viserys’ hands were warm as they tightly gripped mine. “You’re right here with me!”

I mutely stared at him, my jaw wide open. Did I imagine all of this, just so that there could be someone who loved me?

And I thought he’s the delusional one! But it was me all along... even in my dream, I had to borrow the image of another woman...how pathetic.

Alys finally broke the uncomfortable silence. “Whatever your fate in that world may have been, you are in this world now. When you made your last wish, your mind was entangled with this world... bringing this fictional realm to life.”

“You’re more than just my dying hallucination?” Ignoring the desperate Viserys shaking my body, I crackled like the madwoman that I was. “Ha… haha… I’m asking a character of my own imagination… whether they’re real or not!”

“What you believe is true, actually is.” She calmly answered. “There’s no point in asking. You’ve already recreated the world in your image.”

“Blasphemous!” I screamed into her face. “You’re saying like I’m God…”

“You’re no god, but you... your essence... your heart... affected everyone. Have you not been surprised by the kindness of people around you? This is the world you’ve yearned for.”

“Then why am I still… me?!” In a fit of rage, I threw down my gloves and showed her my hand, or where a hand should have been instead of the empty hole in my arm. “Why am I not just... just Alicent? Then I don’t have to... I can…”

“I just want an ordinary life…" I continued, sobbing. “With friends and family, people I love…”

Then it flashed in front of my eyes.

The mirage of my invisible arm, flickering.

“You...” It was Viserys’ turn to be surprised. “Your face... it just...” He had been holding me in his arms, but now he released me, his face laced with shock.

“It... just?” I saw my own hand for a second. Not Alicent’s hand under the gloves. My hand, with a crooked pinky.

Does that mean…

“The image - glamour, as we Westerosi call it - that represents you is the one that most suits the situation you’re in.” Alys explained patiently. “Now that you remembered the truth, it’s no longer absolute... it all depends on your mind.”

“No...” Viserys mumbled. “That’s only an illusion... you’re my wife.”

“If I say I wish to be your wife... that I wish I’m her...” I glared at Alys. “Then why can’t I be her? It all depends on my mind, isn’t it?”

“You still don’t believe you’re her,” she sighed. “Your sense of self is too strong to allow that. You promised your parents to believe in yourself... a promise you take more seriously than anything.”

“Is that so? Then I...” I ground my teeth. “I would rather let the real Alicent come back! Let me die normally!”

“And let the Dance happen as it was supposed to?” Alys’s voice chilled me to the bones. “Let the people you love die horribly?”

I froze. If I had never come here... but wasn’t this all a dream anyway?

No, even if there’s even a one-in-a-million chance for this to be real...

The room suddenly shook. My eardrums were nearly shattered by a ghastly roar almost as loud as an airplane taking off.

“What’s that?” I asked as I covered my ears.

“Dragon! Caraxes!” Viserys shouted at the top of his lungs. “It’s Daemon! How dare he...”

“We’ll have to arrange defenders right now!” Lyonel drew his sword even as he spoke. “Otherwise...”

The two men briefly exchanged glances before running out of the room, “Stay here!” Viserys ordered as he left.

Only Alys stayed with me. “Time is running out,” She reminded me in a tone far more serious than she ever spoke in. “Listen carefully. Your body is but an extension of your consciousness, your will, the essence of your soul. If you can overlook the lies your eyes told you... you can do anything as long as you believe in it strongly enough.”

“Are you telling me to go outside and fight Daemon? This is outrageous, I don’t...”

“And wait here as everyone you love dies around you? I don’t think you’ll do that.” She smirked.

“...Damn it!” I was already dashing out of the room even as my lips opened. If Daemon was going to kill everyone…

Of course, I wasn’t going to stand by and let him do it!


	16. Chapter 11: Her Fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The theme song of this story and background music for this chapter: https://youtu.be/GD0Hoju1fbo

The castle was in a mess now. People rushed in and out of corridors, terrified of Daemon’s attack.

What could I do? Alys may have told me that I had superpowers, but I didn’t feel that I had any. I’d probably have to get to a clearing where I could observe Daemon and Caraxes, then think of a strategy…

“Alicent! What are you doing out here?” Otto yelled, striding across the corridor and catching me before I could even answer. “Viserys told me you’re poisoned by Runciter, but he then didn’t let us see you. Has something happened between the two of you? This is… most unusual.”

So that’s the excuse he gave them?

“I…”

“No, never mind, come with me first,” he suggested, cutting off my reply. “We’re not safe here.”

He hadn’t given me a chance to refuse before he started to pull me along. I wouldn’t be able to attack Daemon if I was with the Hightowers, but what reason could I give him—

“Let me go!” Rhaenyra’s sharp voices echoed through my ears. “I don’t need you anymore! Let go of me!”

_ Don’t tell me… _

I looked around and located her with... Cole, on the other end of the hallway. Rhaenyra was desperately trying to break away from him but Cole had a firm grip on her arm.

Oh, for the sake of—

“Father! I’ll meet up with you later!” I slipped away from Otto, ignoring his shouting behind me.

———

“Rhaenyra, this is madness!”

“I shall hear no more of it! Take your hands off me!”

They were still in a deadlock when I arrived. “Cole! Release her immediately!” I ordered, barely able to catch my breath, Rhaenyra taking advantage of my arrival to shove him off. “Don’t!” Cole cried behind her, but she raced off without acknowledging him.

Cole turned towards me, eyes blazing with hatred. “Why did you stop me? She’s going to fight Daemon!”

“What?” If she’s fighting him, then that meant... “She’s riding Syrax?!”

“She’s the only dragon rider in King’s Landing, and she very well knows it!” He clenched his fists. “I’m her knight... yet I can’t protect her…”

_ Time is running out _ , Alys had told me. Was it not just about stopping Daemon, but Rhaenyra too? “We have to chase after her! Cole, she’s going to the dragon pit, right? We have to go now!”

“You...” He stared at me for a brief moment, eyes wide as saucers. Then he nodded. “This way!”

Myles and Gwayne found us as we tried to get a horse. “Alicent! Where are you going? Father’s very worried. He told us to find you.”

“There’s no time to explain! Give us a ride. We need to go to the dragon pit as fast as possible!”

“But…”

“Gwayne, please! Just this once!”

“You’re going no matter what we say, right?” Myles sighed. “Come on then.”

“It’s for Rhaenyra,” Cole added.

“Very well,” Gwayne agreed reluctantly.

When the four of us arrived, the flapping of dragon-wings high in the sky all but mocked our late arrival.

“Rhaenyra—!” Cole shouted, and she turned to glance at us. Even at this distance, I thought I could see her eyes widening. “Why... Why are you here, Alicent?” She asked.

“For you, of course! Come back down!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. “Daemon won’t be merciful on you!”

“I’m the only hope we have against him!” Her voice was fading as Syrax ascended, “I am no coward! The blood of the Dragon does not hide. I’ll…”

“I’ll protect you, father, and everyone!” These were the last words she left behind…

“No...” But we could only look on as she raced towards the clear skies.

You’re... you’re a true friend, Rhaenyra…

Was there nothing I could do?

I looked up, struck dumb by fear as my worst fears came true. A red monster was flying straight towards Syrax. Daemon’s beast.

“You?” I could faintly hear Daemon’s mocking tone even with the winds roaring around the two dragons. “Viserys sent you against me? No, that can't be. You snuck out on your own.”

“Yes. I did.” Despite her best efforts, Rhaenrya was clearly scared out of her mind. “How... how dare you come back here?!” She stuttered.

“How cute of you to think you can come and talk me down.” Daemon’s laughter chilled me to the bones. “But why should I keep you alive? Corlys shall wed Laena to me after I take the Iron Throne. Nothing less, nothing more.”

“The Velaryons are his allies?!” Myles asked, his mouth agape. “If they’re backing him, then we have no chance... they have three dragons, all battle ready!”

“But they’re not here.” Gwayne’s tone was a lot calmer. “If they’re with him, why don’t we see them?”

Rhaenyra seemed to have reached the same conclusion in the sky. “You lied. If Laena is to be your wife, she would be fighting alongside you right now. Besides, you’re already married!”

“She will be on my side after I win,” Daemon spat. “And that bitch is no wife of mine. Unless you choose to submit now, then I’ll take you instead. You’ll serve well as my mount.” He licked his lips.

“Not in Seven Hells! You tried to rape Alicent!” Rhaenyra screamed. “And now... you’re going to kill everyone!”

“So what?” He didn’t even bother hiding his true intentions now that the truth was out. “She was mine! The Iron Throne should be mine! Viserys never did anything, yet the gods smiled on him! I built a whole kingdom with my own hands, what did he ever accomplish? I’m just here to take what is mine!”

Then Caraxes made its first attack. I held my breath as Syrax barely managed to dodge it.

I had to do something. Neither Rhaenyra nor Syrax had fought before, sooner or later she would…

“Extend!” Seeing no other alternative, I raised my arms in the air and yelled. “Extend, damnit!”

“What are you doing?” Myles asked, clearly puzzled.

“Trying to— get my hands— to reach them!” I hissed. If I imagined hard enough... if I truly believed I could touch them…

But no matter how my fingers scratched, they only uselessly crawled in the air. Frustrated, I yanked on my right hand with my left, hoping to go even one centimetre further.

Gwayne caught my hand. “Stop! Why are you hurting yourself? I know you’re worried, but this isn’t going to help!”

“You don’t understand! She... everyone will die at this rate!” Above us, Syrax let out a roar as Caraxes’ flame licked her flank.

_ Calm down _ , I told myself.  _ Think again _ . What did Alys tell me?

_ “If you can overlook the lies your eyes told you... you can do anything as long as you believe in it strongly enough.” _

The lies my eyes told me... believe in it strongly…

My eyes...

My gaze moved towards where my invisible hand should be. It’s there, I just couldn’t see it...

If I could use this illusion to strengthen my beliefs—

If I could convince myself—

“Is it... that simple all along?” I blurted out. The only thing left was to convince others. “Myles! Please, cut off my arm!”

“What? No!” Myles shook me as if I were a madwoman - which of course I was. “This is madness!”

“Alicent, don’t lose your mind now!” Gwayne tried to encourage me. “We can still win!”

“We’ll only have a chance to win if you cut my arm off right now!” I shove him away. If they wouldn’t do it... “Cole! Cut off my arm!”

“What in the Seven Hells are you playing—”

“It’s to save Rhaenyra!” I pleaded.

He paused. “How…”

“Cut off my arm right now! Will you defy your queen’s order?” I put my arm forwards. “Just do it!”

“Cole, don’t!” Gwayne drew his sword. But Cole was faster.

“Argh!” I definitely felt the instant when metal cut into my flesh. I lost my balance and fell onto the ground, rolling in pain, growling all the way. “Ahh... ehh…”

But through the overwhelming pain, I could feel another type of pain if I focused enough.

My invisible hand, bouncing on the floor.

_ “Your body is but an extension of your consciousness.” _

Even when severed, it’s still a part of me.

And I... could will it.

I tried to control the fingers on my right hand. I could feel my nails digging into the rough ground.

“Argh... good...” Through my pain, I managed to squeeze out a grin.

“Now... float!” I commanded.

It rose unsteadily, not unlike a wizard’s broom on his first flying lesson.

I could feel the air on my fingers, my palm, my front arm, and the bits Cole cut. I could feel every drop of blood, sliding down and hitting the ground.

But this wasn’t enough. A fist meant nothing to Daemon. I would need to speed up... like a bullet.

I turned my eyes into the sky. My vision... was fading. Must be the blood loss... I couldn’t see him clearly.

It didn’t matter. I remembered what he looked like.

When he had appeared in front of us. When he was playing Rummikub with us. When he took me on top of Caraxes to see the sunrise…

...And when he pushed me onto the ground, trying to force himself on me.

My eyes narrowed. My teeth clenched.

I would admit I once thought he wasn’t actually a bad person. That I could feel comfortable talking with him. That misjudgment, that shame... only served to fuel the fire.

“I hate you, Daemon!” I screamed, “You’re the collection of everything I loathe!”

The winds ripped through my open wound, making the pain all but unbearable. I gasped and clenched my fists.

No matter what... I’d stop you!

“Ahhh!” I yelled as I envisioned my fist hitting his face…

...And it did.

“What is this?!” I could hear Daemon even from here, “What in the Seven Hells was that?!”

Then an intense pain shot through my whole body.

“Argh... ahh...” Every part of my body was wrong. Not just the section Cole severed, but more…

“Why did he pull out Dark Sister?” Myles asked, his voice seemingly far away.

Daemon must have cut my front arm into two…

I felt my conscience slipping.

No, I couldn’t give up here! I was so close to making it!

If he cut it off, then every part of me would hit him like a bullet!

I need to focus. I could still feel my arm... my flesh... in the air, dropping.

I stopped them. Then…

_ Accelerate _ .

The second wave of my attack hadn’t caught Daemon by surprise. He still had Dark Sister in hand, and his reflex was so good that he could deflect invisible attacks now that the element of surprise was gone.

But I kept coming back. No matter how many pieces my arm was cut into.

As long as it stalled him long enough for Syrax and Rhaenyra to prepare their attack.

“Rhaenyra! Finish him!” I cried, as a silvery light dropped from the sky.

“He dropped Dark Sister!” Gwayne shouted. “Why? Unless…”

I forced my eyes to focus on Daemon. He... he’s covering his eyes, with several wounds on his neck and face, howling in pain…

Did I do it?

“Alicent!” I could still recognise the loveliest voice in Westeros even amidst the pain. “Why are you here? You’re hurt!”

Oh, Viserys…

“That’s what.. what I want to ask you too...” I coughed. “You should... stay inside…”

He knelt beside me, holding onto my left hand. “What king would I be, if I let my precious Rhaenrya fight for me, while I hide within the safety of my castle’s walls? But you…”

He squeezed my hand, the simple gesture warming my heart. “I told you to stay in your chambers.”

“I... I’m not…”

“I know,” he sighed. “But this wasn’t all a lie, was it?”

I—

“Viserys!” Daemon roared. “You’ve finally come out!”

“Yield, Daemon! I shall spare your life if you yield!”

“Yield? Me? Never!” What was he preparing...? “If I die here, you’ll die with me!” Caraxes abandoned Syrax and barrelled towards us, fire spitting out from mouth of the beast of death—

“Father! NO!”

“I won’t let you do this—!”

Summoning every bit of my flesh, I hurled what was left of myself towards Daemon’s head near the speed of light as Rhaenyra and Syrax smashed into Caraxes.

And both Daemon and Caraxes fell,

Crashing onto the ground before us,

A rumbling shook through my body,

Then I... knew nothing.

———

_ “Mama,” I asked, “What will you do if I die?” _

_ “This isn’t funny.” She frowned. “I’ll cry my eyes out, so don’t you dare to die before us.” _

_ “Okay okay,” I wasn’t being serious anyway, “Then what should I do when you and papa are gone?” _

_ She pursed her lips, “Believe in yourself.” Eventually she added, “And as long as you can, don’t stop believing!” _

_ “...Wow. Cheesy.” I giggled. _

_ “Don’t laugh,” She pouted. “You aren’t allowed to laugh at your mother.” After a thoughtful pause, she added, “And remember…” _

_ “Don’t forget to love yourself... and people around you. There’s always someone you can love.” _

_ “I love you and papa!” I gave her a hug. _

_ She smiled and hugged me back, “As long as you remember... then we would always be with you, no matter how far away.” _

_ “We always love you.” _

———

“Alicent!” Viserys howled. “Alicent!”

“Father, why? I saw Alicent here before... who is this girl?”

“This is the Alicent you know, she just looked different! Alicent... screw it, Amy! Open your eyes!”

“Vi... Viserys...” My eyelids were heavier than lead, but I tried my best to open them. “Rhae... Rhaenyra.”

Two worried, ash-streaked faces lingering in my vision. Neither seemed to be wounded.

I finally did it. I had protected the people I loved…

Perhaps with my very life.

“I...” My lips were shaking. How much blood did I lose? “...I love... you all…”

I had no regrets.

“Amy—!” Viserys screamed.

_ Don’t be so sad, my love. _

_ Maybe if I die now, your wife will return. _

_ Without Daemon, there won’t be a Dance, right? _

_ This is fine— _

With that thought, my heart stopped beating,

And my conscience slipped into a field of nothingness.


	17. Epilogue: Their Ways of Living

**The Realm’s Delight**

Rhaenyra’s opinion on Alicent changed drastically after Syrax ate her arm.

Before, Alicent had kept insisting that Rhaenyra was just a little girl, a girl unfit for the responsibilities her father gave her. Many of the rumours were untrue; the old Alicent hadn’t said anything mean to her; ever so polite, acting like queen and mother outwardly. But behind Alicent’s sweet words, Rhaenyra came to sense that she’s treating her as a stupid child, one too pampered by her father and had to be taught her place.

Rhaenyra couldn’t stand it. After all, she’s the heir of the Iron Throne! She would never be undermined by a Hightower and the children she spawned.

After Aegon was born, it’s clear that Alicent was aiming for Viserys to replace Rhaenyra with him. The implication that a babe could be more able than the Princess of Dragonstone made her blood boil.

Yet after Alicent came back with an invisible arm, she’s completely different.

Childish. Straightforward. Messy, with nearly no regard for social norms. However, Rhaenyra started feeling comfortable talking to her. At first, Rhaenyra was taken back by Alicent’s earnestness in befriending her. Alicent couldn’t possibly be genuine... she must be planning something behind her back.

But she hadn’t told Father a word of the Mushroom incident, despite her obvious anger. And most of all, she had risked her life to prove Syrax’s innocence.

After that, Rhaenyra had to admit that her old nemesis was different. The new Alicent was not perfect, sometimes acting so embarrassingly foolish that Rhaenyra wondered why she even bothered to associate with Alicent at all.

Deep in her heart, she knew why. She liked Alicent because she treated her as an equal. Not bootlicking her like some of her ladies, nor looking down on her the old Alicent did.

She would suddenly stumble upon Alicent with a new box of games or little toys. Every time they had tea together, she would have a brand-new idea of activities. It’s always fun to see what Alicent had in mind... that one time they sneaked into the kitchen to find out how a lemon cake was made was particularly memorable.

Even with her memory loss, Rhaenyra couldn’t understand how she was a completely different person. But now it was clear.

“Amy! Open your eyes!” Her father kept saying, holding the hand of a girl she had never seen.

If the new Alicent was never Alicent at all, then it would explain everything.

The girl— Amy— barely managed to look at them, her eyes half-opened, “Vis... Viserys,” She choked out every word, pain lacing her weak voice. “Rhae... Rhaenyra.”

It’s definitely her. Rhaenyra could see it from the missing right forearm, and— the light of her eyes.

Somehow, even when she was clearly in immense pain, Alicent... Amy still squeezed out a smile. “I... I love... you all…”

Then, with a satisfied smile on her face, her eyelids dropped once again.

“Amy—!” Her father screamed, shaking her body, “Go... someone, fetch a maester!”

He put a hand on her chest and froze. “Her heart has stopped beating...” At this point, the tears he had been holding back finally poured out like a small waterfall. “What’s the point of all these... if neither she nor you could stay on my side?”

Rhaenyra just stood there. Unlike Viserys’ sorrow and guilt, she felt... furious.

“How dare you!” She screamed. “How dare you lie to me and die before you can apologise!”

Ignoring everyone else, she knelt beside Amy and grabbed her head. “You taught me one should always apologise for their wrongdoings! But you have been lying to us all along. How dare you just die and abandon your duty right now! Wake up! WAKE UP!” She screamed into Alicent’s - no, Amy’s - ears, “If you don’t wake up now, we’re no longer friends! Do you hear me?”

Then—

“Argh... um...” Amy coughed, blood spilling out from her mouth, “Rhaenyra…”

She slowly opened an eye.

“You’re a really noisy friend, do you know that?”

**REAL Epilogue: Their Ways of Living & My Little Miracle**

**Amy**

I was to take a nice, long sleep that day, but Rhaenyra just had to wake me up.

Well, I still wanted to be her friend. Now that the truth was out, I couldn’t continue being Otto’s daughter and Myles and Gwayne’s sister, and with Viserys… it was complicated.

But for Rhaenyra, it’s me - ‘Amicent’ - from the last year and half that was her friend, not the Alicent from the past. It’s a relationship I wished to cherish, so I had to wake up, no matter what.

Alys later told me that it was my ‘giving up’ that stopped my heartbeat for the briefest moment in time. I didn’t understand her long-winded explanations. All I knew was that I shouldn’t die as long as I maintained my will to live. That’s what she said, but I was still pretty sure I would die if someone cut my head off.

My hand didn’t grow back this time. After feeling Daemon cutting it into pieces, it was rather hard to convince myself it still existed. The loss of my hand was inconvenient in unexpected ways, one of which was that I kept losing my balance and falling down.

Which of course was what had just happened.

“Aww...” Third time this week. Maybe I should see if I could get a Jaime-style prosthesis, just to weigh my right side down.

I heard mute chuckling all around. Beside me, Viserys half-sighed and extended his hand. “Are you alright... Alicent?”

“Yeah... sorry.” I took his hand and stood back up, sticking my tongue out as I apologised for my clumsiness.

That day, Myles and Gwayne had been surprised by my change in appearance, but it’s me who was most surprised when Otto had finally arrived.

Viserys had attempted to stop him from seeing me— he wanted this trouble no more than myself— but how could anyone stand in Otto’s way to see his little girl?

And when he saw me, he’s completely stunned. “Who... who are—”

I didn’t see the change myself, but I presumed it was this moment when my appearance changed back to Alicent’s. He blinked. “I must be seeing things... growing old now… Alicent, what were you thinking?!”

Later, when I saw Alys again, she had laughed and reminded me my appearance was always an illusion of convenience.

Otto was the one who would always reject my identity as Amy. Failing his girl and having lost her in-between dimensions... he would never accept that. I knew this well, and I did not wish to push this matter further.

Perhaps I was more of a coward than I wanted to admit.

Myles and Gwayne caught up with me later, though. “You changed back?” Once we were alone, the first thing Gwayne did was to point this out.

“Yeah.” They were on my side that whole day, so there was no point in trying to trick them. “I’m sorry for lying. And everything else.”

They exchanged glances. “I know that something is up when father didn’t appear to be mad,” Myles replied, his brows knitted. “You owe us an explanation. Who are you?”

“You aren’t going to kill me for being an evil witch who deceived all of you?”

Gwayne sighed. “I don’t understand your motivation, but it’s clear by this point that you meant no harm. Tell us who - or what - you are. Whether we’ll tell the truth to father, or not, depends on your answer.”

“Well. It’s a long story...” Then I told them everything. Who I was, Why I was here. At the end of it, they had only one question.

“Where did Alicent go, then?”

I bowed my head. “Sorry, but I have no idea. Ask Alys, maybe she’ll know something... but don’t hold much hope.”

I hadn’t felt guilty for replacing Alicent before, because it wasn’t my choice to do so. But now that I knew that it was my fault to a certain extent…

I wanted to help finding her if I could. And apologise to everyone I tricked.

“I see. We’ll search for her... and hide this from father before we have our answer.” Myles said, before doing something I would never have expected. He patted my shoulders. “It’s not your fault. We’ll take care of the rest... but of course, we expect you to help when we need you later.”

“This isn’t what you intended to do, replacing my sister... so I won’t hold this against you,” Gwayne promised. “As long as you act according to your role, you have our word that we won’t expose your secret.”

I was stunned for a moment. Then I smiled, “Thank you,” I said, again and again. “Just... thank you.” What I owed them, I would pay for it with the rest of my life.

“Alicent? Are you there?” Viserys’ voice pulled me back into reality. I nodded embarrassingly. “Yeah, just daydreamed for a bit. Let’s continue.”

We’re here to see Rhaenyra off to Driftmark.

Only a few hours after the battle with Daemon, Laenor Velaryon had come to King’s Landing on the back of his dragon, with a letter from his father.

Corlys admitted that Daemon visited Driftmark after his escape from King’s Landing, but denied offering him bread and salt, and claimed that they chased him off the island. He once again bent the knee to Viserys... and of course, his rightful heir, Rhaenyra.

I could see where this was going.

The back-and-forth negotiations with the Velaryons led to Rhaenyra spending much time at Driftmark. The two fathers had high hopes for their budding ‘romance’, but privately Rhaenyra confessed to me she didn’t want to marry him... for, well, obvious reasons.

I highly doubt that this vacation of hers would turn out to be anything else but a vacation.

Interestingly, Rhea Royce sent both of us an invitation to Runestone, to thank us for getting rid of Daemon. I was highly amused by her letter, but unfortunately we’d have to decline for now.

“Father! Alicent!” Rhaenyra called, “I’m afraid you won’t make it! What’s delaying you?”

“Sorry Rhaenyra, it’s me. I fell on my way here again.” Because Syrax hadn’t completely recovered yet, Rhaenyra wouldn’t be traveling to Driftmark on dragon-back, but we’d unchain her so she could follow Rhaenyra if she wanted. I wished this wouldn’t turn disastrous.

“Should know it was you.” She grinned. “Do be careful, I’ll be sad if you survived Daemon but died because you’re being your clumsy self.”

“Hey! This isn’t fair! I only fell because of my hand!” We continued to bicker for a while before Rhaenyra pulled me aside and whispered. “Do try to sort it out with my father while I’m away. It’s exhausting to see you two.”

“Uhh, okay, I’ll try...” It’s nice that she’s being supportive and all, but with Viserys…

“Don’t say that! Just do it!” She ordered, then lamely added, “You know I’d rather have you than Alicent.”

“Yeah,” I muttered, but I knew he wouldn’t. “I’ll try my best.”

We sent her away together with Cole (who was way too pleased with Rhaenyra’s disinterest in Laenor) and others.

I just really hoped nothing would go wrong.

“It’ll be fine,” Viserys said, noticing my frown. “She knows what to do.”

“Um, yeah, you’re right.” I nodded. “It’s just, I…”

“Can’t believe that everything will go smoothly?” He smiled warmly. “You worry even more than I do. let’s go back.”

“Yeah.” Sometimes it’s hard to look at him in the eye.

Viserys had been stunned by my transformation back to Alicent. “You really came back?” He had asked, with such a joyful tone that I found it hard to tell him the truth again.

But I did anyway.

“No... it’s still Amy. I just... turned back…”

“Oh.” The disappointment on his face was apparent, yet he still forced out a smile, “I’m glad that you’re alright. Did you turn back because of Otto?”

“Yeah. At least, I think it is.”

“It’s better this way. It’ll be hard to explain to others what happened to Alicent, and who you are... will you continue to be my queen, at least in public?”

“Of course. It’s the least I could do... and I’ll do my best to find Alicent too. I... I didn’t mean to... trick you.”

“I know. You did so much for all of us, and I know you didn’t want to replace her.”

He had accepted me, my situation, and my identity. Yet he still loved Alicent... and I didn’t want to change that, not by replacing her in his heart.

Viserys must have sensed that too. He still maintained a distance from me, just like when I was first self-inserted. But I did promise I would try my best.

“Viserys!” Gathering up all my energy, I nervously suggested, “How about we play together for a while after we go back? I have a new game I’d love to test before showing the kids.”

He blinked in confusion, not expecting me to ask him about that. Then he nodded. “Of course!”

He smiled, more genuinely happy now that I finally wasn’t avoiding him, like I did in the past month.

I couldn’t help but smile too. One small step forward…

Even if he wouldn’t love me the way he had for Alicent, I wanted to remain by his side. Maybe one day we could find Alicent, and maybe I would return to my old life, finding myself on a hospital bed, rescued from the sea…

Or maybe she wouldn’t return, and eventually I would…

No, I shook my head, it wasn’t right to hope for that.

But no matter how the future goes—

“I’m grateful,” I told him. “For everything.”

And experiencing this moment was a little miracle for me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, the ending theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKJ8qvQyAgU  
> This is the official end of this story, so if you read through the whole thing to here, thanks for reading!  
> However, there's one bonus chapter remain, in which your favorite Watcher Alys will answer your questions and thoughts.  
> So if you have any questions, ask away in the comments!


	18. Bonus: Backstage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Attention: What you’re about to read is a chaotic, fourth-wall breaking peek behind the curtains of Man, I Surely Hate Dragons.
> 
> It frequently ignores the characterization present in the main story for comedy effect, so please have fun and don’t think about it too hard!

_You find yourself in a void, with only a woman with cue cards in her hands and a door behind her. Having read the story, you recognise her as Alys Rivers, the Watcher._

Alys: Well met, traveller. Welcome to the backstage of Man, I Surely Hate Dragons.

_She smiles mysteriously._

Alys: You must be surprised by this change of format and fourth-wall-breaking. This is a non-canon chapter of the story, so do please excuse the author for trying out new things…

_She puts her hand on the door handle._

Alys: How about we go in first, and I’ll explain everything to them as well?

_She opens the door. Behind, you spot many familiar characters sitting in a circle. They are ‘Amicent’, Viserys, Rhaenyra, Otto - and Daemon, who is chained to his chair…_

Daemon: Release me, damn you!

Amicent: And let you kill us all? No thanks.

Viserys: Aren’t you dead anyway? What are you doing here?

Alys: Oh, allow me to explain... This is the backstage of the story, so anything is possible.

Rhaenyra: So, like when a movie is finished and all the actors sit down and talk about their roles?

Amicent: Sounds like it... wait, why do you know what a movie is?

Alys: It’s backstage. Everyone has knowledge as the plot demands.

Otto: That’s correct. For example, I know that... you’re not actually my daughter!

Amicent: I didn’t mean to trick you, but I didn’t have a choice! You know you were going to make a mess of things if you knew the truth... this is supposed to be a happy ending, you know?

Otto: Hm. You got rid of Daemon, so I’ll reserve judgment for now.

Viserys: Is this really a happy ending though? Alicent didn’t come back, and Amy and I didn’t even end up together.

Rhaenyra: Yeah, I was so looking forward to that and you’ve disappointed all the fans of this ship!

Amicent: Well, this is hard... romance is hard…

Alys: According to the author, this story was not supposed to have romance apart from a few crushes. The feelings Viserys and Amy had for each other was completely unplanned.

Amicent: What? Really? So I wasn’t meant to fall in love with him?

Alys: The original plan had you dream of falling in love with him in the future.

Daemon: How about me? Was I supposed to have a better ending?

Otto: No way! You can go rot in the Seven Hells!

Alys: Actually… the ending was the same, but Amy actually had feelings for you at one point.

Viserys/Rhaenyra/Otto: What in the Seven Hells?

Viserys: I can’t believe you would betray me like that…

Amicent: Wait! I’m innocent! I only love you! I don’t even like him!

Daemon: Liar! Didn’t you once say you felt comfortable talking to me?

Amicent: Stop peeking into my inner thoughts!

Alys: This is getting out of hand, so let me explain. When writing the sunrise scene, the author realised Amy wouldn’t crush on Daemon, so the plan was changed.

Amicent: See? I never had a crush on him. Not at all.

Daemon: Shame, woman, shame. You could have gotten together with the best—

Amicent/Viserys: Shut up.

Rhaenyra: So… what are we doing now? I seem to recall the author saying something about answering the readers’ questions.

Otto: Indeed. The biggest question is... where did my real daughter go? And how can we get her back?

Alys: Alicent Hightower found herself in another universe.

Amicent: My world?

Alys: No, another universe— where Rhaenyra Targaryen wasn’t born.

Rhaenyra: Oh… Huh? I don’t exist?

Otto: That’ll mean Aegon is Viserys’ heir and no Dance…

Alys: Indeed so. A happy ending for her, and House Hightower. Knowing this, do you still want to find her?

Otto: It would still be nice to see her, if only just once…

Viserys: If she’s happy, with another version of me and our children, then... I can accept that.

Alys: Sadly, I won’t be telling you this in the main story.

Amicent: Why do you wish for us to suffer?

Alys: I have another use of this truth... all for my prince.

Viserys: I told you, woman, you’re not getting my son.

Amicent: Aemond may not be my real son, but you’re still not getting him.

Rhaenyra: I don’t get it. Aemond is a bloody baby! How could you be in love with him?

Alys: Ah, just in time for us to move onto the next section: character analysis. For the introduction, I’ll talk about myself first.

Amicent: What about the readers’ questions?

Alys: There aren’t many questions, so we’ll cover them later. Explaining my character will answer some of them too.

Amicent: Alright…

Alys: The author said that I was the biggest plot device character in this story.

Daemon: Wow, what about my Mysaria? Or your father, or Runciter? They did nothing in the story.

Otto: I hate to admit it, but he has a point. There are many characters that had little development in the story.

Amicent: Um, I think what Alys means is that she had a major role yet barely elaborated motives…

Alys: Truly the SI, you understand the author’s words. Allow me to explain myself. I was born with the ability to see the past and the future.

Rhaenyra: Mmm, that was touched upon in the Hand’s PoV chapter, wasn’t it?

Alys: While that’s true, most people would still assume my ability is gained from studying or mythical encounters, but I had none of that. I was able to see the past and the future as soon as I was born. However, the future is written in stone and I’m not allowed to change it.

Amicent: That’s sad…

Otto: Interesting. Was this because we’re in a fictional world?

Alys: Correct. Even if I tried to change the future, my attempt would already be part of it— so instead, I fixated on the happy parts of the future I saw.

Amicent: And that’ll be your time with Aemond.

Daemon: That’s seriously messed up.

Everyone else: You’re not the one to talk, psychopath!

Daemon: Psychopath? Is that what I am? Those modern mental disorders terms are dumb.

Alys: The author will admit that she doesn’t know well about it. What she’s certain is that you have a mental condition.

Daemon: What a stupid, lazy author. Doesn’t even take her time to copy some definitions down from Wikipedia?

Viserys: You’re way too complicated for armchair psychologists.

Alys: This is a good time to talk about your character, Prince Daemon... as the main antagonist of the story.

Daemon: Ha! This story could have easily been me claiming the Iron Throne and building a harem, if not for that meddling bitch.

Amicent: Do you want me to poke out your eye again? Because I’ll be very glad to do it.

Rhaenyra: You wouldn’t be able to win anyway. You’d be a kinslayer, and the Velaryons would be coming for you and denouncing you as another Maegor... which would probably lead to me marrying Laenor again, come to think about it.

Viserys: Would you really have killed me, Daemon?

Amicent: Um, pretty sure that’s what he tried to do with that last attack.

Daemon: You’re so stupid, brother. Of course I’d have killed you! You trusted that imposter over me! And still do!

Amicent: Me being an imposter had nothing to do with you trying to rape me!

Otto: Not only that, but you also impregnated my maiden daughter before leaving her.

Daemon: I didn’t know she was pregnant. Seriously, if I knew I wouldn’t have left her.

Everyone else: Bullshit.

Daemon: It’s true! I wanted a child, to see if parenting would make me feel anything. So I’d have stuck around for that.

Rhaenyra: You don’t feel a thing for anyone.

Daemon: That’s the author’s fault. For all we know, Rhaenyra, we could have been in love in canon.

Amicent: I doubt that. You’re a piece of shit in canon too.

Alys: Trying to explain Daemon’s behaviour in canon is the reason the author chose this characterisation in this story. Since the original plan of this story, he was always intended to be the antagonist and the final big boss. His death was also unchanged from the plan.

Daemon: Hmph. Without me, there wouldn’t have been anything to talk about in this story.

Otto: You’re a hindrance of the highest order. I had everything in control before you came along.

Amicent: You controlled nothing! I had to try hard so that you wouldn’t ruin my relationship with Rhaenyra!

Otto: If not for me coming to King’s Landing, you wouldn’t have even gotten a chance to repair your friendship with her... and you aren’t even really my girl anyway.

Viserys: This is going nowhere. Are we going to talk about the next character now?

Alys: Otto Hightower was up next, but he has just demonstrated what kind of character he is… a haughty and hard-working man with his daughter as his biggest weaknesses.

Rhaenyra: Speaking of which, why aren’t Ser Gwayne and Ser Myles here if we’re discussing characters? And my Criston, too.

Amicent: Yeah, I would rather have them than Daemon... send him back to the hell he belongs.

Daemon: Isn’t it obvious? They aren’t main characters. And I’m staying around as long as possible.

Alys: The author can’t deal with so many characters on screen at the same time. There’s not much to analyse about the Hightower brothers, and Criston Cole barely had a presence within this story.

Daemon: In other words, not main characters.

Viserys: Hmm, I don’t think there’s much to analyse about any of us anyway. We aren’t monsters like Daemon, after all.

Daemon: I didn’t choose to be one.

Amicent: Yeah, you’re a tragic character too... just kidding, you’re the worst. But anyway, I think there’s plenty about your character to discuss, Viserys.

Rhaenyra: Huh? Father is a nice man and a great father. Is there anything else?

Daemon: How about the part of being a pathetic man who can only get my hand-downs?

Viserys: She only had a fling with you. Alicent— the real Alicent— loathed you.

Otto: I’ll actually say we’re rather similar, your Grace. We’re both family men, we both spoil our daughters…

Amicent: What I want to talk about is the delusional part. I didn’t expect you to... you know, lock me up.

Viserys: I’m sorry, I just needed time to process the truth…

Alys: That was a very deliberate decision on the author’s part— to highlight the biggest weakness of your character. In canon you’re known to bury your head in the sand even when everyone around you are at each other’s throats. Instead of facing a problem, you hide in your fantasies and refuse to come out.

Viserys: I accepted the truth in the end, though.

Alys: If not for my appearance, this could have easily turned into a situation where you locked her up for the rest of her life.

Amicent: No way. He isn’t like... eh, Baelor the Blessed.

Rhaenyra: Yeah, take that back! You’re making him into some sort of creep!

_Viserys hung his head in shame._

Daemon: Who said something about not being a monster again?

Otto: You two aren’t on the same level at all.

Alys: The author also wants to mention that Viserys being the focus of quite a few of the later chapters wasn’t in the original plan, and the details were mostly only fleshed out when writing the Daemon-focused chapters.

Daemon: See? you’re only second to me!

Viserys: I’ve had enough of this... can we please get to the rest of the characters? Rhaenyra, do you want to talk about yourself?

Rhaenyra: Sure, father. I’m obviously a pretty, loyal, brave, and able princess—

Otto: A brat.

Amicent: Sorry Rhaenyra, that’s too much compliment you’re putting on yourself. Otto is right.

Rhaenyra: You’re the worst friend ever.

Daemon: It still isn’t too late to switch sides, Rhaenyra, I can give you all the praises you want—

Viserys: You stay away from her!

Alys: The author agrees that Rhaenyra is a headstrong brat. However, she’s brave, loyal to those she considers friends, and will certainly grow to be a good queen with the right influence.

Amicent: You know, I bet the readers weren’t expecting a Green SI to be pro-Rhaenyra.

Alys: The author wants to portray the Greens in a more positive light because there are already many Black-focused fics out there— but she doesn’t dislike the Blacks and has no problem with Rhaenyra being Queen.

Amicent: That’s basically where I stand too... well, I’m a SI after all. Wait, are we talking about my character now? Well, the readers should already know that I’m a stupid girl with no self-preservation sense.

Rhaenyra: Agree.

Otto: I have to agree.

Daemon: Dumber than rocks. How come you didn’t notice what I was trying to do?

Amicent: You aren’t allowed to say that! Only I can say bad things about myself!

Viserys: Amy, you... you’re a sweet girl who did more for us than we could ever thank you for.

Amicent: Wha— Don’t say that... I didn’t do anything special…

_She blushed. They didn’t look at each other’s eyes for a while._

Alys: Hopefully the interaction above answers the question of whether they will end up together or not. As Amy herself said, she had no self-preservation sense— and in fact would have committed suicide in the real world long ago if not for her parents.

Amicent: Don’t just tell everyone my secret like that... besides, wouldn’t that clash with my portrayal as a happy-go-lucky anime protagonist?

Rhaenyra: Hm, I think it had been shown early in the story that you didn’t have the best life. Am I not your first friend, after all?

Amicent: ...Yeah, you are.

Alys: The original idea of this story was ‘An immature SI with a dark backstory’, so it goes hand-in-hand— having no friends makes Amy more childish, since she had next to no chance to interact with people before getting self-inserted. I also want to take a moment to talk about her death in the real world.

Amicent: I kept dreaming about that day, but never came close to remembering the truth…

Otto: Your death wasn’t such a surprise. Most SIs died before being self-inserted.

Amicent: Yeah, but usually it’s a car crash or some kind of tragic accident, not murder.

Alys: The unique way you died won’t be discussed here, since the author doesn’t want to go deep into real-world politics. But what she wants to mention is how the encrypted message is literally the first thing the readers saw. The author had hoped for people to speculate about it— which didn’t work.

Amicent: Hmm, there’s like, a grand total of one person who had mentioned it in their comments— for future readers, that’s when this chapter was first posted. Obviously we couldn’t account for later readers.

Alys: People aren’t used to the SI being a mystery for the readers to solve. It’s a shame— the author would certainly love it if more SIs used this concept in the future.

Daemon: And so we’ve finally finished with analysing all the major characters. This is already way longer than any chapter in this story. Say what you have to and end this already.

Otto: Impatient much?

Daemon: You people are taking too long with everything, and it’s boring. Get on with it.

Alys: Some readers have questions about what happens to this universe and these characters... Let me reassure you, readers: There won’t be a Dance. Only peace, at least for the next few decades. As bittersweet as some parts of the ending were, it’s definitely still a happy ending. Amy will stay on Viserys’ side and raise the three half-Hightower children, who all turn out to be very different from their canon counterparts.

Amicent: Well, that’s nice.

Rhaenyra: I won’t marry Laenor, right? Who will I end up with?

Alys: Gwayne Hightower.

Everyone else: WHAT?

Otto: That’s certainly good news... but, how?

Viserys: Ser Gwayne is a nice young man and he’s only four years Rhaenyra’s elder... I could approve this match.

Rhaenyra: I have a good impression of him and all, but I don’t think I like him that way. At least, not at the moment.

Alys: You won’t fall in love with him until later.

Rhaenyra: Okay... are there any questions left?

Viserys: Someone wants to know what the public knows about Daemon’s attack and the situation with Amy. The answer is nothing: they only know that Daemon tried to rape the queen, escaped, and came back to seize the crown. His attempt failed and nobody mourned him.

Daemon: Mysaria mourned me.

Otto: She’s most likely dead, a lone woman on the Stepstones…

Daemon: She. Mourned. Me.

Amicent: You don’t actually care about her at all... moving on. Runciter actually died the same year he did in canon, so his replacement is the same as canon too.

Rhaenyra: You remember his name?!

Amicent: Why do you have to focus on that... I only received this knowledge because it’s backstage. In the story, I still don’t remember his name.

Alys: Runciter is a truly tragic character. He did what he believed was best with the information he had, and died for his efforts... and you don’t even remember his name.

Viserys: He still let Daemon out. That’s treason and he deserved death.

Amicent: Viserys, I love you, but we all know this isn’t your reason for killing him.

Otto: Anyway, this should answer all the questions.

Alys: Indeed so. Amy, it’s your turn to say the final few words.

Amicent: So sudden?! Ahh, umm, ehh…

Viserys: Calm down. Take a deep breath.

Amicent: Okay. Thanks. I can do this. Readers... thanks for reading my story.

_She tries to pose a smile for the camera._

Amicent: For everyone who said this story is sweet and lovely, you have my deepest gratitude. For the rest of you... I don’t know whether my story has touched your heart. This is pretty much a lighthearted story not quite in the vein of normal ASOIAF fics, so if you’re expecting something else I apologise... but this is my story, and I stand by it.

_Viserys and Rhaenyra each gave her an encouraging smile._

Amicent: I didn’t always have the best life. This story is fictional, but my struggle is real. I only want an ordinary life... this is my journey in getting one, even if it’s still a bit unusual. And if some parts of it have resonated with you... I’ll be very happy.

_Everyone smiled (apart from Daemon). Then the screen darkened._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks for reading all these!
> 
> Special thanks to my beta readers, Leonie and Bullet; My editor in later chapters, FieryMatter; and Widowmaker and Oddfather in providing me advice on warning issues.
> 
> 2019-2020 wasn’t a good period, both for where I live and the rest of the world. We have conflicts not entirely unlike the Dance, and while the real-world conflicts can’t be solved so easily, I took comfort in solving a fictional one.
> 
> As Amy said, as long as some parts of this story resonate with you, my dear readers, I’ll be very happy. This is a very personal story for me, so I hope it’ll be meaningful to you too.
> 
> I wish to see you all again in the future for my next game/story. Goodbye for now, and good luck!


	19. Extra: Happy Children

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pure fluff.

**The Princess of Dragonstone**

Rhaenyra considered her days in King’s Landing busy and troublesome. She’s not talking about her childhood; no, she’s talking about now, when she came back from Dragonstone to prepare for her wedding.

It had to be perfect. Marrying Gwayne wasn’t a match approved by half of the kingdom, despite it finally satisfying Otto Hightower’s wish to seat one of his blood on the Iron Throne eventually. Corlys and Rhaenys were no doubt angry about being skipped again, especially after what Laenor did...

She sighed. For all of Amy’s faults, she was the only one who supported her scheme to help him in her immediate family.

But thinking of Laenor wouldn’t help. At least Laena had approved. Rhaenyra had finally picked a perfect style of dress to wear, when—

“Princess,” Criston called outside the door, “Prince Aegon wishes to see you.”

“Tell him I’m busy.” Couldn’t a girl enjoy some private time?

“He said it’s urgent.” There’s a hidden amusement in the knight’s voice. Was this revenge for not including him in most of the wedding plan? Oh please, for as good as a knight he was, Rhaenyra knew from experience that she couldn’t trust his taste in clothing.

Criston was dear to her, but his temper and tendency to be envious had been troubling.

Rhaenyra sighed, “Let him in, but tell him if this isn’t actually urgent, he would have Seven Hells to pay.”

A mere moment later, the door creaked open and Aegon entered, his eyes nervously glancing around. “Father and Mother aren’t here, are they?”

“Do you think they’re going to hide under my bed? Of course, they aren’t.” She crossed her arms. “Tell me what trouble you’ve put yourself into and convince me to help you. You have thirty seconds.”

“Wait, Rhaenyra, this isn’t my fault—”

“Thirty. Twenty-nine. Twenty-eight...”

“Alright, it’s Aemond, he made a mess of things and... Helaena tried to take care of it but she’s only making it worse... Father and Mother absolutely couldn’t know this, you’re our only hope—”

“You realize that you aren’t exactly making your case appealing?”

Surprised by her rebuke, he went silent, his mouth opening and closing several times like a fish stuck on land. Rhaenyra sighed. “Just tell me where they are.”

———

Rhaenyra almost screamed when she arrived at the crime scene.

The floor was wet. A sticky, paste-like white powder was everywhere. But the biggest offense was the shiny blue fragments that were once a flower case lying on the ground and the wooden practice sword beside Aemond. Would playing outside kill them?

Both Helaena and Aemond were kneeling on the ground, trying to salvage the mess. “I’m back!” Aegon announced, and they raised their little heads instantly.

“Rhaenyra saves us!” Helaena raced towards her and caught her hand with her two small ones. Rhaenyra could feel the sticky cold paste on her fingers.

“Yikes.” This was the first word that naturally came out of Rhaenyra’s mouth. Helaena faked a look of hurt as Rhaenyra pulled her hand away. “What’s this disgusting white paste?” Rhaenyra asked.

“Glue-powder,” answered Aemond, his fingers still poking at the fragments. “Helaena’s idea.”

“Let me guess. One of you broke the case.” Rhaenyra mercilessly glared at them one by one; Aegon awkwardly averted his gaze. Helaena let out a nervous chuckle. Only Aemond stared back fearlessly.

“I did,” The youngest child admitted. “And I’m trying to fix it.”

“...By making the room even messier, I can see.” Rhaenyra sighed. “Stop trying to pick up the pieces, you’re only going to prick your little fingers.”

“Criston,” When Aemond finally crossed his short little arms and stood aside, Rhaenyra called, “Please call some good servants, loyal ones that will keep their mouths shut. We’ll have to get someone to clean this up.”

“Gladly, Princess.” Her loyal knight accepted the ‘quest’ with as much enthusiasm as a dead fish.

“Wait, Ser Criston!” Aegon stopped him, then turned to plead with Rhaenyra. “This won’t work! Even if they keep quiet, Father or Mother will soon notice that the case is gone. And that case is Mother’s favorite...”

“Moreover, it’s Laenor’s gift, a symbol of peace between the Hightowers and Velaryons,” Rhaenyra added. “Not that I expect children to understand.”

“Cousin Laenor was a kind man and seemed to be fond of us on his last visit...” Helaena mused. Suddenly her eyes brightened, “Oh! Rhaenyra, do you think we can ask him to bring a new one—”

“Not when he’s on another journey and years away from Westeros.” Rhaenyra cut her off. “Last we heard of him, he’s enjoying his time in the Summer Islands, searching for trade opportunities so you can taste those ‘chocolates’ that your mother craves so much.”

“Mama said it might be bitter, and we’d need to add milk to sweeten it.” Helaena started to smile, her eyes stared into the distance as she imagined the flavor Amy had no doubt described a hundred times.

Amy had been close to blowing her cover, Rhaenyra recalled, when Laenor brought back the goods from Yi-Ti. The case Aemond broke was Amy’s favorite because, to quote her, “My grandma used to have one of these!”

It’s a miracle that no one had found that line particularly noteworthy and merely dismissed it as one of the Queen’s eccentricities. Even Otto Hightower had only sighed and told her this wasn’t true.

“Focus, Helaena,” The sharp voice of Aemond scolding his sister brought Rhaenyra back to reality. “Chocolates can wait. Fixing this can’t.”

“You're not the one to talk when you’re the one who broke it in the first place!” Helaena snapped back, “And you messed up the amount of glue-powder we needed!”

“Aegon was the one who told me to get—”

“Yes, it’s all my fault, happy?” Aegon hissed. “Now will we go back to the matter at hand?”

At least one of them had some sense, Rhaenyra thought. “Just call the servants. As special as the case is, it’s no family heirloom that couldn’t be replaced. Your mother will be less angry with you if she sees that you have the initiative to clean up yourself and admit the accident to her.”

Not that she thought Amy could stay angry at those three for more than a day. She put all her efforts into educating them, determined to provide them with what ‘education’ she had in another world.

Which, sadly, sometimes had... unforeseen consequences.

“Mama did say that a hero always admits their own mistakes, so that they can improve,” Aemond mused, “I can do this. Just like...”

“Prince Sapphire?” Aegon asked.

“No, not Helaena’s favorite character.”

“Prince Sapphire is my favorite tale, but she isn’t my favorite character. My favorite character is—”

“Children.” Rhaenyra repressed the urge to groan. “Back to the topic. We’ll call servants to clean this up, then at dinner time you’ll tell Father and Alicent what happened, and I’ll put in a good word for you three. Are we clear?”

Helaena nodded. “That’s fair.”

“...If Father asked, it’s Aemond who broke the case and Helaena’s idea to patch it up with glue-powder.” Aegon glared at Rhaenyra for a moment, likely unhappy with her suggestion, but when Rhaenyra raised an eyebrow in response he quickly turned his head away. Good boy.

“It’s settled then.” Rhaenyra glanced at Criston. He nodded and left the room to call for servants. Strangely, he seemed to have more enthusiasm than before, a smirk hanging on his face.

“You did well, Princess,” He commented and flashed her a knowing smile before leaving.

...He must have been amused by the children’s antics, Rhaenyra thought.

“Now, before I pull you three out of this disaster and find your nannies to clean you up, tell me: what possessed you to play in this room of all places?” Rhaenyra asked. “Especially you, Aegon. You know very well what this room stores.”

Upon hearing her question, both Aegon and Helaena groaned, their accusing gazes aimed squarely at Aemond. Of course it was the troublemaker’s idea.

Aemond, for his part, shouted, “I’m not going to be left alone while you two play with your dragons.”

Rhaenyra tilted her head. “You can very well claim a hatchling for yourself if you want, or try for an older one if you wish. No one will stop you.”

Aemond proudly puffed up his chest. “I have no need for one of  _ these _ . A true hero relies on his skills, his brain, and his heart.”

...Amy, what  _ have _ you done?

“Mama said it’s in the order of ‘heart, brain, skills’,” Helaena corrected him, “And she never said we shouldn’t have a dragon.”

“That’s because you two are weak!” Aemond spread his hands. “I, however, will rely on me and my sword along—”

Aegon rolled his eyes. “Aemond, last time we’re on a practice field I beat you. Cleanly.”

“You’re three years older than me and even then just barely! Sooner or later I’ll beat everyone.”

Rhaenyra had heard enough. “I’ll talk to your mother about this... dragon-hating thing you have, and I’m no longer interested in your reasons. Now, get out of this room and promise me that you’ll keep swordplay practice in the field.”

Aemond picked up his sword. “I won’t come back, but you have to know that I’m right.”

“It’s your choice if you don’t want a dragon, but I’ll need to inform Alicent and Father about this,” Rhaenyra sighed, “Because I’m your older sister.”

“...That you are,” Aemond grudgingly said.

“Don’t mind Aemond, he’s just being stupidly prideful,” Helaena beamed at Rhaenyra, “Thanks for your help, Rhaenyra.”

“I’m not! I’m right.”

“Right, right, Aemond.” Aegon tried his best to calm down the ready-to-explode-in-righteous-fury Aemond, then turned to Rhaenyra with a worried look.

“...You’ll put in a good word for us, right?”

Rhaenyra laughed. “Of course! Trust me. When have I ever broken a promise with you three?”

“Never.” Aegon smiled. Then they walked out of the room, Rhaenyra finally managing to send them out on their merry way. Dinner would be interesting...

Rhaenyra couldn’t believe at one point she hated them for threatening her inheritance. They’re all such noisy, lovable idiots.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might wonder why I suddenly decided to update. Well, there's a reason to celebrate: My latest game, Lyanna in Harrenhal, is out!  
> Check it out here: https://dashingdon.com/go/7544


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